When Realities Collide
by Cool Steve
Summary: [Being reuploaded chapter by chapter: Chapter 16 with new authors notes. DONE! FINISHED!] What happens when a Hey Arnold! fan gets somehow transported to their world? Find out in this epic tale when worlds meet and realities collide.
1. Wishing

_**Introduction**_

It's hard to believe that at the time of posting this introduction, it had been two years since I first started typing this story. "When Realities Collide" was my first real attempt at a HA! chaptered story, started December 21, 2003. I was very active in the fanfic community at the time, reading countless fics by amazing authors, and wanted to see if I could write a story of my own. This was the result.

Of course, I never really gave this fic a chance. I always thought it was a mediocre story, and that I would never reach the pinnacle of creative talent hit by so many other writers out there. Some people have such a knack for putting words together, pulling off some truly astounding stories. I know I could never write something so great, by this was my first effort to see if I could make it as an author. I wanted to write a sizeable story that would offer a lot of reading pleasure for readers out there, where things got a little hectic in the HA! world. Looking back on it now, reviews and all, this was a pretty good fic. I still wish I could have made it a real "epic" of 50,000 plus words and 25 something chapters. I never saw it as a real good fic with the way it was written, etc, but yet others who read it thought it was pretty good. That's the problem when you write or draw something; you may never be satisfied with it, but others may look and it and think it's the greatest thing ever. In the end, I think this fic was surprisingly successful for what it was.

My purpose of revising and re-posting everything is that for being my first chaptered story, it's somewhat of a mess. And since I have grown to be such a perfectionist, it needs to be cleaned up a bit. Moreover, my computer died in March 2005 and I lost a little bit of revisions I had made for the last two chapters. I read through the whole story _again_ and changed minor areas so they read better. I also found a great deal of spelling errors, and after all these years I thought I had made this story error free. I also left the original authors notes to all the chapters, and labeled them as such because they are heavily dated now, but I still wanted to keep them for nostalgia. Doing all of this makes me feel I have closed a somewhat abandoned project and now I am free to peruse another. It's also one last effort to catch any new readers and reviewers that didn't discover this fic the first time around. :)

I just like to say thanks to everyone who helped me with this story – and you know who you are. I learned many things about creative writing as I wrote this fanfic; it was quite the experience.

_Cool Steve, December 2005_

o----o

It was around 11pm on Saturday night. I was in my room, eating some reheated leftover pizza. I had just read some great _Hey Arnold!_ related fanfics and I thought 'Wow!'. The stories people came up with about the show, about the Arnold and Helga relationship; wishing _I _could write something like that, a story that would stand out from all the rest. But I was fooling myself. I could never come up with the complex writings and storylines others have blessed among avid readers. Sure, I tried writing one fic, about the Arnold and Helga relationship with Lila being in the way, but it was going nowhere. MDT, a great HA! fanfic writer was going through it for me to edit it, but I still felt there was no hope. I knew the story _did_ have potential, maybe if someone else had written my idea it would have turned out the way I wanted.

I sat there in my lounge chair, with my laptop on my lap trying to come up with an idea. Some complex…love story of sorts, but just couldn't get ideas to flow. I started to think of the writings in some sitcoms and movies to get some sort of idea, but everything was a blur. I needed inspiration…I needed _something_…

So I went downstairs, careful not to wake my mother who was asleep, to the living room. I pulled out a tape with some _Hey Arnold!_ episodes I had recorded off TV. I put the tape in the VCR and started watching. With laptop by my side, I tried vigorously to get an idea.

It was getting late, and while trying to look for an idea to write about, my thoughts started to wander. I started to think about Arnold's world; about the neighborhood, the kids, about how cool it would be to just dive into Arnold's city, to take a look around in his universe. 'Man, would that ever be cool.' I thought, 'To actually meet Arnold and the gang.'

It was about midnight and I was getting tired. I just sat there, watching episodes of my recorded show. But something…wasn't right. Maybe it was the glare from the TV just playing a trick on me, but it seemed like the picture was glowing brighter than usual. In fact, it was…I perked up.

"What the hell…?" I trailed off.

I got up from the crossed-legged position I had been sitting in on the floor and was on my knees in front of the TV. The glow was even brighter now and cast a white beam across the dark, unlit living room. 'Something is really wrong here, but what?' I thought.

I reluctantly reached out my hand to touch the screen, and as my fingers touched it, the screen rippled like throwing a pebble into a pond. 'Okay', I thought to myself, 'no more late night leftover pizza for me.' Curiously, I pushed my hand in a little further and I found my hand could go through the screen; it was just like putting your hand into a bucket of water. I could see my hand on the other side…except it was flat, and had a peachy cartoonish skin color to it.

"What the…? -" I was cut off. Suddenly the glow flashed into a blinding white light…then everything went black.


	2. What The F!

**(Original Authors Notes)**

Disclaimer: I do not own _Hey Arnold!_, but I do own a 1993 Ford Taurus that I love to drive, but it's slowly dying on me cause of transmission problems. Never buy a Ford!

Notes: Wow, do I ever feel like a newbie around here. Three reviews after one chapter? Wow, that broke all my expectations! I don't know how you guys will like the story, I really don't like it. I feel sorta forced to write it. I have great ideas to write about, but can never seem to put these thoughts on paper; and when I try to I sometimes think I am wasting my time. My first HA! fic, one for those over 18 only, was a pure work of fandom. I wasn't pressured; I just let my creativity flow. Do I need more self esteem or what? Okay, I'll stop babbling. I'm still building...I guess you would call it suspense!

Sidenote: If someone would be up to the challenge to see if they could draw me as a nine year old kid, I'd like to see you try! You can find pix of me here at my HA! website, Arnold's Room. Maybe someone could make a movie like poster for this fic that features some of the characters. I am asking too much? My drawings skills are very limited. Like fic writing, I wish I could draw _waaaaay_ better than I do now.

o----o

Seconds later I woke up, a little dizzy with a slightly clouded head. Everything was blue and bright; I was staring up at the sky. Something was tickling me on the back of my neck. It was grass. I slowly sat up and took a look around. I was in a park.

"How…did I end up here? W-what the hell is going on!"

I stood up and took a look at the surroundings. They were different…but still somewhat familiar, like I had seen them somewhere before. I took a walk on a path to the front entrance of the park where I saw a sign. It read "_Tina Park_".

"_Tina Park_? What the fuck? But…but that means…" I said as I looked across the street at a store, which had painted on its window _Hillwood_ _City Hats_. Then it hit me like a ton of bricks. Somehow, someway, I had been transported to Arnold's neighborhood!

"**_NO WAY_**, this can't be happening!" I said to myself, "I'm actually…_in_ Hillwood! But how…?" I didn't dwell long on the fact I was here, I didn't want to, the fact was my dream came true and I was in Arnold's world.

I walked across the street to Hillwood City Hats and paused. I saw a refection in the glass of the store's window. It was me…or _was_ it? Then I realized – being transported into this world had turned me into a cartoon character! It looked like me, but everything looked more exaggerated and colorful. My dirty blonde hair was so bright and had a big weird style to it. The eyes on my face were very large with, not blue, but small black pupils. The size of my head was enormous and I had a stick for a neck. I could almost put my whole hand around my neck…and at looking at my hands, I only had four fingers on each of them! I was wearing the same clothes I had been wearing when I was transported from the living room – a pair of dark blue sweat pants with two white stripes going down the side of each leg, and a plain white T-shirt. I looked down at my feet to find giant black shoes. I looked a little odd, but I somehow looked normal in a world like this. But something was very off. I was shorter, _way_ shorter, plus I didn't have any facial hair or acne at all. Then another thing hit me…I was no longer 19, but I was a young child again, like I had just backtracked ten years into my life. And the thing is I didn't feel like nine, I still felt like I was 19. I had the brains of a teen but was in the body of a kid!

"Wow, this is so boss. Wait, did I just say that?"

With my whole body tingling with anticipation and excitement, I quickly took off walking to explore the vast new world I had just entered. Being the _Hey Arnold!_ fanatic I was, I knew a lot about Arnold's city and where things were. I was like a kid in a candy store.

"There's Slausen's Ice Cream Shop, Gino's Slovaki Stand, Roscoo's Funky Rags." I said as I pointed buildings out.

I was walking around the city like I had never seen a city before. I had a dazed look on my face, walking around like a little toddler, just totally infatuated with my being in such a place. I was looking up, down and everywhere, I was so thrilled. Maybe that's why I didn't see that car coming right at me.

"Grandpa, look out!"

_SCREEEEEEEEEEEECH!_


	3. Is That Really Him?

**(Original Authors Notes)**

Notes: Okay, just so you guys know, I upload everything as a .doc (Word) file. As a result, text that is underlined, italicized, bolded or made a larger font won't show up here. This story will be on my website when it's done and will be up as a downloadable Word doc. You can find my URL in my profile. This sucks, cause now the fic loses its expression, force, and meaning in some areas. In chapter 2, a link didn't show up in my notes, I dunno why. Just go to my profile, hit the link to Arnold's Room, and then go to the "About Me" page. If you don't get why the following link is here, read the notes from that chapter. As for the "F-bomb" Jae, yes, there are some in my story, mostly just in MY inner thought dialogue. I have put the rating up to PG-13 to be safe; and I feel it's still far clean enough so it won't be rated R. And Jae, my eyes are blue, like oceans...pun intended. Mmmm, I should fix that when I upload the fic to my site. Thanks for the heads up. Here is Chapter 3...whooo, can you feel the action building:)

o----o

After the dust cleared, my arms were in front of my face and my eyes where tightly shut. Without my knowing, I had accidentally walked off the sidewalk and onto the road. 'Great, I just got myself killed and I was only in the city for five minutes.' I thought.

"Momma Leonie! Are you okay?"

That voice…that familiar elderly voice. I opened my eyes to find the green Packard inches away in front of me, and Phil was coming out of the car to see if I was okay.

"Oh man, you're not hurt are you?"

That other voice…that caring voice of concern…oh my god, it was _Arnold_! Arnold…ah who gives a damn about his name; it was Arnold, in the flesh…well, not quite. But it was him none the less and he and his Grandpa were by my side. I was so shocked I couldn't find the words to say anything.

"Uh, bah, I…-" I stuttered.

"Oh no, we've scared the ability to form words right out of him!" Phil exclaimed. "He'll sue!"

"Clam down Grandpa. Hey, what's your name?" Arnold said as he put his hand on my shoulder.

"Name? My name?" In all this commotion I almost couldn't remember my own name. "It's…Stephen, name's Stephen."

"Nice to meet you, I'm Arnold." he said as we shook hands.

"Yeah, I know…I mean…I know…that's a Packard, isn't it?" I had almost let my guard down.

"Why yes it is," the old man stated, "a 1946 Clipper, built to last this baby, not like those plastic Japanese econo-boxes of today." he said as he pat the hood, then the driver's side mirror fell off. "Mmm, looks like I'll have to use more ductape next time." he said as he quickly picked it up and pressed it back on.

"Uh Grandpa, I think we should continue this conversation somewhere else, like not in the middle of the street. Stephen, you want a ride. I mean, we _did_ almost hit you."

"Hey, totally my fault, I wasn't watching where I was going. But I will take you up on that ride."

So we all piled into the Packard, me in the backseat with Phil and Arnold up front. We started driving and soon Arnold turned around – and as I predicted from his character, fired away with the questions.

"So Steve – mind if I call ya that?…"

"No problem."

"…I haven't seen you here around the city before. Did you move here recently?"

"Uh, yeah…I just moved here from, Canada. Yeah, that's it, Canada."

"Oh, great country. First-class maple syrup and bacon. You gotta love Canadian bacon!" Phil commented as he drove.

"Really?" Arnold said, "That's an awfully far move from home."

"Oh well, needed a change of pace I guess. I like this city, it has a certain…quality that I find every interesting."

"So what school do you go to?" Arnold asked.

"Uh", I stammered, "I'll be going to PS 118. Since I just moved here I'll be going there this Monday, fourth grade."

"Really, I'm in the fourth grade too. Glad to see that you'll be in our class."

We had pulled up in front of the boarding house now. It was everything it looked like from the series, except it was much bigger when you got to see it up close.

"You want to stay for dinner, Stephen?" Phil asked, "We'll be having pizza."

"Sure, pizza sounds good." I said.

"C'mon Stephen, we can hang out in my room until its ready." Arnold said as we got out of the Packard.

As I entered the boarding house, I was so floored. It looked so…_real_. The kitchen was straight ahead, the staircase was to my right and the dining room to my left.

"Steve, you comin'?"

"Huh?" I didn't notice Arnold was halfway up the stairs already. I quickly followed up to him and soon we were at the door of his room. He opened the door and I was absolutely taken away. I was in his room – Arnold's totally kick ass room! The skylight, the stereo, the flip out couch, the colourful carpeting, it was all there, it was all so cool.

"Oh man Arnold, I love your room, its fu-…". I stopped myself. I wasn't 19 in appearance anymore, so I had better watch my language. "It's totally amazing, it looks even better up close."

Arnold looked at me with a confused look. "What do you mean up close?"

'Oh crap, keep it cool Stephen'. I thought. "Uh, I mean, I saw the skylight when we were outside and man, does that skylight ever look cool, look at it!"

"Yeah, it's okay I guess." he said as he sat down at his desk.

Arnold probably thought I was a total nut job. I sat on the couch while he typed away on his computer. It was then I noticed a small sliver microcassette recorder on the small table beside me. 'This could come in handy.' I thought as I quickly pocketed the device. After a moment of silence, Arnold started to drill me with more questions.

"So Stephen, where do you live?"

"Uh, well, thing is…no where right now. I know it's a little short notice, but maybe your Grandpa could rent me a room for a while?"

"Well, what about your parents?"

"Uh, parents…" I had to make up another lie right on the spot. "Well, uh, they'll be along in a while. They're really busy, running a company that distributes high tech software. They were looking to move to this area of town and merge with another company. They're too busy to come looking for a place to live right now, so they sent me down here…y'know, to check out the town." I was so bad at lying, plus I was starting to sweat.

"Really? But you're only a kid."

"No, I'm ninete-…, nine. Don't worry Arnold, I can take care of myself."

"Well, if you say so." Arnold replied, buying my lame story. As I looked across the room, I found a little pink book on a shelf. I went over and picked it up.

"What's this little pink book here?" As if I didn't know.

"That?" Arnold got up from his desk. "This is a book that belongs to someone, some girl. Who knows whose it is. My friend Gerald and I worked on it all day one time trying to find who owned it."

"Why is this page ripped out here?" It felt so funny knowing it all.

"It's a long story, a girl named…-" suddenly he was cut off from a voice downstairs.

"Tex and company! Come on down to the corral and grab the grub while the grub is hot! _Yeee-haaa!_"

Arnold just looked at me. "Don't ask."


	4. So This Is What Its Like

**(Original Authors Notes)**

Notes: To PopStarOE: You know what? That psychic thing could work in a fic, but this fic takes place after almost everything in the series.

To Professor: Quote, "Oh, and I also think you're a great writer, so don't ever say otherwise. I just hate it when people put themselves down." That's funny…I sort of have admirers. When I e-mail people about their fics or artwork when I think it's the greatest thing since sliced bread, they think its crap, and I will not have it. You're saying you like this fic? Like Gerald says, "Whatever you say." I am amazed.

To Jae: The "Fu-" thing, remember the story is...well, now it's pretty much done. I'll just post chapters over time. What's written is written.

Everyone else: Yes, chapters aren't big at all, but they look bigger in a Word document with a Times New Roman 12 pt. font. When I post them here, I'll admit, they are as small as anything length wise. It will get better though. Keep reading!

I must say, after four reviews on the first chapter, then almost nothing on the second, I thought no one was paying attention to this fic. But it seems to be catching people and making them read. And you all say for me to check out your fics. Call my nuts, but I wanna go through all 54 pages of HA! fics at fanfiction dot net for my site. It may take me years, but think of the material and great stories – adventures if you will, that I'd find. I'll uncover fanfics that have been dormant for years!

This chapter…I guess is intro, or filler. Very boring in my opinion.

Disclaimer: I do not own _Hey Arnold!_, nor a holding account in the Cayman Islands, so quit bugging me:P

o----o

Arnold and I went downstairs to "grab the grub" so to speak. As we entered the dining room I recognized all the crazy eccentric boarders. There was Phil, Ernie, Mr. Hyunh, and dirt bag in my opinion, Oskar with wife Suzie sitting around the dining room table.

"Everyone, this is Arnold's little friend Stephen and he'll be joining us for dinner." Grandpa introduced.

"Well, actually," I said as I sat down, "I may be staying longer than you think. I was wondering if you could, I dunno, rent me a room for a while, until I get myself settled in this town."

"Aren't you a little young to be living on your own?" Ernie said.

"Yes, this city is very big." Mr. Hyunh added.

"I dunno," Phil said with his hand on his chin, "this happened a while ago with Arnold's little friend with the big hair. I rented him a room for a while and he couldn't handle the responsibility. And what about money?"

"Oh come on Grandpa, he's just a kid." Arnold pleaded. "He could just stay with me in my room, I don't mind, plus he could do chores around the boarding house."

I nodded in agreement.

"Well, okay. As long as you pull your own weight, I say welcome aboard!" Phil confirmed.

I breathed a sigh a relief. "Thanks Arnold, you're a good guy."

"No problem Steve, happy I could help."

Seconds later, Arnold's loveable yet loonie Grandma came in with a big cowboy hat on, carrying along with her a giant pizza.

"_Yeee-haaa!_" she belted, "Gather round the chuck wagon yall, took me all day to wrestle this beast to the ground."

She walked around and put the pizza slices on everyone's plate, but no one touched it.

"Pookie, I thought we were having pizza." Phil inquired.

"We are cowboy, it's pizza 'on the range' style."

What lay on the pizza weren't traditional toppings. It looked to me like every animal that lived 'on the range' was now sliced up into little toppings on my pizza. I could have sworn I saw bits of antelope antlers on there.

"Ugh," I was on the verge of being sick," Arnold, I think I just lost my appetite."

"Yeah, me too. Grandpa, can we be excused?"

"I think we can all be excused." he replied.

"Can I have your pizza slices, aheh-heh-heh-heh?" Oskar asked.

"Go nuts." I said, giving him the slices.

o----o

Later on, after eating some real pizza thanks to Phil getting some delivered, Arnold and I were getting ready for bed.

"I hope the couch is okay." the football head asked.

"Ah, it's fine." I said sitting on it. "Thanks a lot Arnold, doing this for me and all. I mean you practically let a person you don't even know into your house and sleep in your room."

"See, I don't see it like that. I personally think I have a sixth sense about people, and I can tell if…well, if you're a 'scum bag' or not."

We both laughed.

Arnold was getting in his bed. "So it's gonna be your first day at a new school tomorrow."

"Yeah, I guess it is."

"You nervous?"

"A little, but I make friends easily. I can't wait to see the gang."

"Wait…how do _you_ know them?"

"Uh, I mean…where I come from we say things like that. '_Going to see the gang_' and whatnot."

"I see. Good night then, Stephen." he said as he turned off the lights.

"Nite Arnold," I said, "thanks again."

I didn't sleep a wink that night. Even though I was in a place I loved, I couldn't shake a lingering feeling deep down in the pit of my stomach. How _was_ I going to get back home? I couldn't live in this place forever; I needed to somehow find a way back home before it was too late.


	5. The Bus Ride

**(Original Authors Notes)**

Notes: To BrianaLFBH: Thanks for all your kind reviews, they are greatly appreciated. Seems like your dad's computer is really f'ed up. What fics have you written? Yes, I am the "Arnold's Room" guy...and remember that later on when you read the fic, heh-heh.

To stevetheloser: Mmmm, I may have to rewrite something. Nice use of your psychic powers there buddy, because that is coming up. But hey, like the series itself, and a lot of other cartoons and live-action shows out there – and many fanfics too – they have a couple of holes in the storylines. Hopefully mine won't be like a slice of Swiss if you catch my drift.

To Professor: Quote, "Helga pines for Arnold, somehow she gets Arnold to pine for her, and in the end everyone lives happily ever after." I still can't help but love those stories. Each one has different twists and turns about how they come together. The "unrequited love" theme is what keeps me addicted to my fandom of the series and fics. I could get to Helga fall for me (she's hot, lol!)…but that's another story…just an idea, no work on it yet, I'm just too busy! I _wish_ I was nine again! And the jealous thing has been done in "_Weird Cousin_". Plus I'm a Lila hater, as you will find that out later in the fic.

Finally, the story starts gettin' juicy! It's now Monday morning...

Disclaimer: I do not own _Hey Arnold!_…or maybe I do! Maybe I'm in L.A. right now with Craig working on a secret underground project to get TJM made…or maybe not…or maybe I am! Or maybe I should just stop rambling and let you read the story!

o----o

"_Hey Arnold_, _Hey Arnold_, _Hey Arnold_, _Hey_-"

I slowly opened my eyes. I hadn't slept a wink. My eyelids were so heavy I could barely keep them open. I let out a loud yawn.

"What the heck time is it?" I asked.

"7am." Arnold replied as he was making his bed.

"Ugggghhhhh." I muttered, wiping the sleep from my eyes.

"Didn't sleep well I take it?"

"Yeah well, what can you do," I said, "I never sleep right the first night in a different place. And that goes double for this wor-…" 'Oops, another slip of the tongue.' I quickly thought. "Wo-, wooo…_woah_ boy, my back sure is sore." I stretched, again with a lame cover up.

"Okay then…" he said with a perplexed look on his face, "I'll see you downstairs. Don't forget to make…your couch." he said with a slight smile on his face.

"Oh, hold up, you think I could take a shower?"

"Well, not if you wanna wait twenty minutes. We only have one bathroom and eight boarders, and it's the early morning rush-hour right now."

I was almost going to mention Phil's secret bathroom, but stopped my tongue before making a word of it. I lifted my shirt and sniffed under my arms, the odour wasn't that bad. "Nah, forget it." I said.

I made my "bed" and met up with Arnold downstairs. Luckily Gertrude hadn't made anything for breakfast. No offence to her, but I'd rather have a root canal than try to digest one of her meals. Instead, she had laid out a sort of breakfast bar. Pieces of toast, that were a little burnt, with our choice of peanut butters and jams. We quickly ate and left the boarding house to walk down to the bus stop. Arnold let me use an old backpack that he had for school. It had some wear and tear but was overall still in good shape. We both made it to the bus stop and after a short while the bus came and stopped in front of us. _(Hence, they call it a bus stop…yes, I am poking fun at myself with the way I wrote that.)_

"Here goes nothing." I said taking a deep breath.

"Don't worry Steve, it'll be fine. Just stick with me."

The bus doors opened with a hiss, and I felt a tiny chill ripple down my spine. I actually never had to deal with the fact of being the new kid. I had gone to the same elementary and high school all my life, so the concept of being the "newbie" was kind of tough. Arnold and I got on, and somewhat of an eerie silence fell over the bus. Then I heard the whispers…

"Who's the new kid?" the kid with the green hat said.

"Whoever he is, that outfit is atrocious. Sweatpants went out with the 80's." the girl with designer shoes said as she filed her nails.

I felt like a lab rat being huddled over a bunch of scientists in a cage.

"Hey Arnold, over here buddy!" the kid with the extremely tall hair said, waving his hand. We went over to where Gerald was sitting; he had saved us some seats near the back. "Who's the new guy?"

Before Arnold could put a word in, I spoke up giving him my hand to shake. "I'm Stephen, I just moved here from outta…country. And you are?" As if I didn't know.

"I'm Gerald, nice to meet you man." he said as Arnold and I took our seats.

I leaned over to Arnold, "Well, so far so good I guess. So who are all these kids?"

"Well," Arnold began pointing each kid out, "Up at the front of the bus is Rhonda and sitting with her is Nadine. Over here on the left is Sid, Harold and Stinky. Right there is Eugene and Sheena, and over here on the right is Iggy, Park, Robert and Brainy."

"_We're all gonna die!_ If we don't keep this bus' speed over 50 miles per hour it'll explode! We're all doomed, _doomed I tells ya!_"

"And that kid swinging from the bus' ceiling is Curly." Gerald added.

"Someone's missing…" I said under my breath.

"Huh?" inquired Arnold.

"Oh, nothing. So, is that everyone?"

"Well, there is one more…-" he cut off in mid sentence as the bus stopped and opened its doors. A girl with a pink bow and dress promptly marched on and flashed the driver her bus pass without a second thought, with her little dark-haired assistant following close behind her.

"Outta my wait geek-bait." she said as she scowled for a seat. "Move it four eyes, I'm sittin' here!" she ordered as she practically picked up Robert and drop-kicked him out of his seat.

"Who's that?" I asked. 'The one and only…' I thought.

"Helga," Gerald replied, "Helga G. Pataki. She's the meanest son of a gun on the school grounds since…actually, she's pretty much been a terror since preschool."

"Yeah, you'd better just avoid her altogether." Arnold added.

"Why does she act like she's so peeved off at the world?"

"It's Helga, is there a comprehensive reason behind why she does anything! The girl's cranky, opinionated, loud, obnoxious, pushy, she yells at everyone…" Gerald said as he counted on his fingers.

"Gerald," Arnold protested. "Helga's just a little…rough around the edges per say. She can be…_okay_ when the time comes. Oh, and that girl sitting with her is Phoebe."

"Oh, I see." I just shook my head in response, as I was more interested in the girl in pink. "Well, as for Helga over there, she doesn't seem so tough."

As I said that, Helga took a sudden look over at me from where she was sitting, probably wondering who I was. It was one of those quick, three-second weird moments when strangers make eye contact.

The bus then stopped again and opened its doors. A girl with a green dress came on.

"Who's she?" I asked.

"That's…_mmmm_, Lila." Arnold had the words 'love struck' written all over his face.

"Arnold has this thing for Lila…why, I'll never know." Gerald said.

"_Lila_." I whispered to myself, 'Ugh, what a little miss perfect bitch. Leading Arnold on like that…_hmmm_,' I wondered to myself, 'Maybe I could change things between Arnold and Lila while I'm here.' Being the Lila hater I was, I wanted to shake things up between her and Arnold. So nonchalantly, I spoke. "Huh, she doesn't look so hot."

Arnold immediately perked up from the love daze he was in. "Excuse me?"

"Oh boy," Gerald stated, "now you've done it."

"That is Lila, _Lila Sawyer_! She's the most perfect girl in the cosmos. Lovely, smart, sophisticated…-"

"Manufactured, stereotypical, a total faker." I added.

"What! You don't even know her!" objected Arnold.

"Oh believe me Arnold, I do."

Both Arnold and Gerald looked at me with a "what does he mean by that?" expression on their faces.

"Well, I mean…I know women that are like _that_. They're totally two dimensional (Rim shot!). They're pretty, and that's it. They have no personality and have the IQ of a peanut."

Arnold just glared at me, arms crossed in protest.

"Besides, no one is totally perfect Arnold, everyone has flaws."

"Nah-uh, not Lila." he replied.

"Fine," I said, wanting to drop the subject, "whatever you say Arnold."


	6. Entering PS 118

**(Original Authors Notes)**

Notes: Thanks to stevetheloser…if it weren't for him and his little comment, I wouldn't have pulled 'out of my butt' a quick little scene about school registration. On that note, I take all suggestions if people have any. I may not use all of them, but all opinions are welcome. By the way, when I woke up and was speaking to Arnold, I was going to say the word "world". Anyway, spent a fair bit on time revising this chapter, because the original version lacked…stuff.

Parody of an old hippie song "_Where have all the reviewers gone…?_" Hope you people are out there, the adventure just gets better and better! Oh, that sounded cheesy!

Disclaimer: I do own _Hey Arnold!  
_I do own _Hey Arnold!  
_I do own _Hey Arnold!  
_I do own _Hey Arnold!  
_All work and no play make jack a dull boy.  
I do own _Hey Arnold!  
_I do own _Hey Arnold!  
_I do own _Hey Arnold!  
_I do own _Hey Arnold!  
_(Inside joke – if you watch _The Simpsons_ you'll understand)

o----o

After a while the bus finally pulled up in front of Public School 118. I took a look at the grounds, pondering about all the events that happened, right here at this school, throughout the series.

"Stephen, _hello_, you gonna ride the bus downtown or what?"

"Huh?" in the midst of my daydreaming I had almost forgotten to get off the bus.

"Man Stephen, you're just like Arnold. Daydreaming all the time, totally off in space."

Arnold gave Gerald a half-lidded sarcastic look. We walked into the halls of PS 118, which were bursting with life from all different ages of kids. Small third graders all the way up to the big fifth and sixth graders. Down the hall I recognized Maria and Connie. To my left I saw Arnold's first love interest, airhead Ruth MacDougal. We continued to walk around until Arnold hit me with a question that caught me way off guard.

"Hey, I almost forgot, do you have your papers?"

"P-papers?" I replied.

"Yeah, you know, your registration papers."

"You didn't think you could just walk into the classroom and sit down and expect no one would notice." added Gerald. (_Poking more fun at myself, cause that is originally what was going to happen!_)

"Papers…oh yeah, papers…uh, yeah, I got my papers…I, uh…have to go down to see Mr. Wartz for those, I'll be right back." And with that I scooted off in a flash, leaving Arnold and Gerald in my dust. I had no idea what I was going to do – I had to think of something fast.

I quickly found Principal Wartz's office. 'Plan, I need a plan.' I thought. I scanned the surroundings of the hallway and saw Curly walking by. 'Score!'

"_Psst_. Hey, you."

Curly stopped and looked my way. "Who, me?"

"Yeah, come here."

"Who the heck are you?" he inquired.

"Quiet, _they_ have spies everywhere." I knew that would get his attention.

"Who's _they_?"

"That's not important. The important thing here is that I was sent here from a higher power to protect you. _They_ are after you."

Curly immediately played along with my charade "A-_Ah_! I knew it, I knew it all the time. I'll never let 'em take me down, _never_!"

"Okay good, now this is what I need you do to. I need you to create a distraction and get Wartz out of his office. He holds some important papers and I need to get my hands on them so I can complete my top secret mission."

"Hmm, yes, good plan. But what happens afterwards?"

"One of my associates will contact you before the week is out to give you the details of the top secret mission."

"Oh, sounds juicy, real underground type stuff. What type of distraction do you need? I got a whole list of 'em."

"It's up to you, but I need to get in there before the bell rings," I looked up at the clock on the wall, "and that's in five minutes! Go, _go_!"

And with that, Curly ran off while I waited behind the corner near Wartz's office. Seconds later, Curly came screaming down the hallways with a bunch of tetherballs.

"That's right Wartz, I got 'em all, all the balls! I have the power, I own this school now! _Bhwaa-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!_"

Wartz threw open his door. "What the! Young man, halt in the name of PS 118!"

With staff and students looking on, I crept my way into Wartz's office and started to rummage around in his file folders.

"C'mon, c'mon, where are they!" I nervously flipped through folders and papers. "Permanent records, school budget, teachers lounge hidden camera photos?…bingo, student registration forms!"

I swiftly left Wartz's office unnoticed, and ran over to the nearest boy's washroom and hastily filled out the form, with all false and made up information of course. Hopefully I would be out of this world before my identity backfired on me. I walked as calmly as I could until I found classroom 206. It looked just as I thought it would, and it had the smell of…academics in it…or maybe that was the lemon cleaner the janitors used. It was kind of nice to be back in the fourth grade, even though it wasn't in my world, it was still pleasant. Just then Arnold came up to me.

"Hey Steve, what's up? You're all sweaty and out of breath."

"Uh, ah," I panted, "It's that crazy Curly kid, causing havoc down by Wartz's office, whipping tetherballs at everyone, total chaos!"

"Oh, so that must be why those medical guys are running down the hallway with a straightjacket."

Mr. Simmons noticed our presence at the doorway and got up from his desk and greeted us.

"Oh, hello there Arnold. W-who is this?"

"This is a new student," Arnold introduced. "Stephen-…uh, what _is_ your last name?"

"I'll tell you mine if you tell me yours." I said.

"Well, it's…"

_RIIIIIIIIIIIIIIING!_

Cut off by the bell. 'Damn it,' I thought 'so close.' The kids started to slowly flood into the classroom.

"Oh, you better take your seats fellas. And Stephen, I'm Mr. Simmons, the fourth grade teacher here at PS 118. I assume you have your papers in order."

"Nice to meet you. Here they are, sir."

"Well, what a gentleman. Let's see here…"

He scanned the papers slowly as I stood there in a cold sweat, hoping he wouldn't question anything.

"Everything looks okay here."

I breathed a sigh of relief. "That's good. Um, where can I sit?"

"Oh, you can sit in the back there," he pointed. "And don't forget to seize this very special day!"

"_Sure_, I'll get right on that." I walked passed Arnold who was already in his seat and quickly whispered, "Is this guy for real?"

He just snickered and looked up at me with a confirming look. I walked up to the back and took my seat. I was in the same row as Arnold, just back two seats. As the other kids started to sit down I couldn't help but stare at them, thinking about the stories that have unfolded in their lives, things that only I knew of. It was so much fun knowing all their secrets, all their troubles. 'I could really cause some damage.' I thought. Suddenly my thoughts were interrupted.

"Shove off toots, I'm walkin' here." a disgruntled little girl bellowed as she marched over to her seat. As she walked over to me, I quickly realized that her seat was the empty one in front of mine. I took a quick look at her, but she caught my eye. "Hey, who's the newbie?" she asked out loud.

Deciding to play it tough, I spoke up, "Why, who's askin?"

"You're that kid I saw on the bus. You think you're hot stuff, teabag?" she said in retaliation.

"Why don't you shut your pie hole Helga and take a seat." I said arms crossed.

She confronted me, hunched over my desk and looked at me straight in the eye. "How do _you_ know my name?"

I cockily put my face up to hers until we were nose-to-nose, "I know a lot of things, _Hel-ga_. So don't tread in the deep end if you can't swim."

She slowly backed off, glaring at me with a confused, yet kind of fearful look on her face. I myself didn't know what I had just said, I just wanted to freak her out a little. Luckily she bought my threat and sat down.

Sid, who was on my left whispered to me, "Hey man, I've never seen someone shut up Helga like that before, way to go."

"Thanks man. It's a skill." I said. Looks like I had just made a friend.

o----o

Those clock hands had to be going backwards. The minutes up to the first recess were exasperating. You think being in fourth grade would have been easier for me since I had already been there. But that was ten years ago and the education system had changed a lot, even in this dimension. Plus I was out of high school for about a year when I got sucked into this place, so getting back into the grind of tests and keeping notes was a bit of a challenge. Finally after a long wait the recess bell rang and I practically leapt out of my seat.

"Oh thank god, I thought I was gonna die." I said as Arnold, Gerald and I walked out of the classroom to the playground. "I mean, how can a guy go on for an hour talking about how a Venus fly trap digests its food?"

"If you thought that was bad, he actually came dressed up as a pie to teach math one time, cause he wanted to make learning circumferences of circles _fun_. His catchphrase to the class: 'Math, easy as pie.'" Gerald complained.

"And then there was the time…-"

"Outta my way football head!" Helga blared as Arnold kissed the ground.

As Gerald and I helped Arnold up, I said, "Arnold, why do you let her push you around…literally."

"You just learn to live with it, I guess." he replied.

"Oh _come on_ Arnold, don't you feel that you have to get back at her?" I said.

"Two wrongs don't make a right Steve." Arnold said as he opened the door outside to the playground.

"But three wrongs…" Gerald added with a smile.

"No, Gerald." He turned back to me. "I have tried numerous times to get back at her, and it doesn't make a difference. Like back last April – on the first of that month April Fool's jokes were flying everywhere, and Helga got me. So I decided to get back at her, so long story short…-"

"You guys danced a feisty tango and both ended up in the YMAA gym pool…" I stopped.

"How did you know…?"

"W-well, you know how it is Arnold, news gets around. As the new kid I have been somewhat informed of the things that have happened here at PS 118. Like the flood, Trash Can Day, et cetera, et cetera." 'Yeah, good cover up!' I thought.

"Well, whadda you guys wanna do?" Gerald asked. Both Arnold and I shrugged. There wasn't that much to do. My elementary school wasn't in the city; it was less urban and more rural, with grassy fields you could run in, with a baseball and soccer field and a big playground. But at PS 118 everything was fencing and concrete. There was a jungle gym, tetherball, monkey bars, swings and some faded hopscotch and 4-square court games painted on the ground. That was pretty much it.

"I dunno, you guys just wanna hang out on the jungle gym?" I asked.

"Sure." they both replied.

So there we were, just hanging out on the gym. I myself took this time to gawk around the landscape, looking at the kids playing, all doing their own _thang_. Rhonda was walking around with Nadine writing up fashion tickets for everyone, with Nadine paying more attention to the creepy crawlers on the ground. Park, Robert and Iggy were playing crazy eights. Brainy was somewhere lurking in the shadows. Eugene had somehow gotten himself tangled in the swings and Sheena was trying to help him out. Curly was stalking Rhonda with a pair of binoculars, and Helga was with Phoebe; glaring at Lila who was sending her enchanting mist over the boys and making them worship the ground she walked on. Then, Helga turned her head to me; her eyelids very narrow, like she was threatening me with just her eyes. I just retuned the look trying not to be intimidated, but wondered what she was thinking. Sid, Stinky and Harold came over to where we were.

"Oh, so you're that new kid I saw today." Harold stated, "Where you from?"

"Canada."

"_Ohhh_, so you're Canadian, _eeeehhhhhhh?_ _Look at me guys, I'm a Canadian. I wear a toque and live in an igloo and eat blubber with other slooooow hosers_. Ha-ha-ha!"

"What's your problem, Harold?" Sid said.

"Yeah, why do ya have to be so dang ornery?" Stinky stated.

I got off the jungle gym and announced, "Well Harold, you _must_ be Canadian, cause you're the slowest person I've ever met. _Eeeh, look at me, I'm Harold, and I can't buy a shirt that covers my big fat gut! I'm so fat cause I eat nothing but Canadian bacon! It takes me five minutes to figure out a two second joke, cause I'm so slooooooooow!_"

All of the guys gasped.

Harold immediately got serious, pounding his fist into his hand. "You wanna find out how it feels to be pounded from a guy that's two times your size?"

"I don't think that's a good idea, Harold. You wanna know why?"

"Why?" he asked, getting ready to flatten me like a pancake.

"Because I know about you…you and Rhonda and Big Patty."

Harold instantly changed his tone. "I-I, don't know what you're talking about."

"Oh, but I think you do Harold." I said as I walked around him, "Wouldn't it be a pity, if, let's say some information leaked out to…I don't know, _someone told Patty that you still have a thing for Rhonda!_"

All the guys leaned in for a closer ear.

"Y-y-you wouldn't." he asked in fear.

"Wouldn't I?" I said with a very laid back look. "Hey, Patty, come over here, I think Harold has something he would like to tell you!" I mocked.

Harold was quick to react, "Okay, okay man. You've made your case, just shut up about it." And with that Harold crept away into the shadows of the playground. I turned to the guys that were on the jungle gym, totally in awe with what I had just done.

"Stephen, that was freakin' amazing!" Sid commented.

"I ain't never seen Harold act so scared before!" Stinky declared.

"That was some nice use of blackmail, Steve." Gerald added.

"That was kinda mean Stephen, to do that to Harold." Arnold voiced.

I got up and sat beside Arnold on the jungle gym and put my arm on his shoulder. "See Arnold, this is where you and I part ways in opinion. I see it as a chance to make that big, dumb dolt respect us kids more. You don't let people walk all over you Arnold. No offence, but you seem to be that type of person."

"Well, I don't solve my problems using methods like blackmail."

"You know Arnold, I knew when you used to be…cool. In the sense of, you didn't _always_ do the right thing. You sometimes got in trouble, you broke the laws sometimes…"

"What do you mean you know what I _used_ to be like?"

"See Arnold, I also have a sixth sense let's say, that allows me to dive into people's personalities. I can look at someone and in seconds I'll know all about that person, in some cases I'll know more about them then they do about themselves." I hoped he was going to buy my story, because I was just spittin' out bullshit.

_RIIIIIIIIIIIIING!_

"Boy howdy, back on the chain gang." Sid said as he started to walk back to the building.

The gang and I made our way back in the school. 'My thoughts exactly.'


	7. Intimidation

**(Original Authors Notes)**

Notes: Hooray, let's hear it for saving and uploading things in HTML! Hip, hip!…I feel I should re-upload all the chapters, because now the fic will run better with italicized words and such.

To Professor: The "teabag" line was used in the episode "_It Girl"_.

To Jae: It's just that nobody, in my opinion, really talked to Helga like that before. I thought it was good, but whatever. There was no intension of me making Arnold into anyone else, I don't know where you got that idea from. I'm was just commenting on the early days of the series, where Arnold's character was far better and _way_ less dense. About the school health issues, never heard of that, but maybe I could have worked something into the story. Oh well.

To Will: Glad I hooked, lined, and sunk you! LOL!

The message I seem to be getting from everyone is that they think this is going to be a really LONG adventure series. Hey, I wish I _could_ write stories like "Blue Oceans", "Same In The End" and "What Is And What Would Never Be", but I just can't.

o----o

(A/n: The whole reason I wrote this story came from the events that happen in the second part of this chapter with Helga.)

One thing hadn't changed. It was still half an hour until lunch and I was starving. I always had a fast metabolism, but now with my nine year old body I felt like a car revving at the redline, eating up all my fuel. I was lost in a haze of words as Mr. Simmons talked about the anatomy of the common frog. But something caught my attention. I didn't realize at first, but sitting behind Helga was the best seat in the house. I could both analyze Helga and Arnold, I felt like Dr. Bliss. Helga was busy sketching a picture of her beloved in pink pen in her notebook. She quickly looked over her shoulder to see if I was looking, and I hastily faked taking notes. Later on in the class I got to see the more 'rough around the edges' Helga. The spitballs started flying at Arnold's head. When Arnold had gotten up to sharpen his pencil, Helga put a wad of her gum on his seat. I just sat back and laughed to myself at the craziness. Then I saw a sight of Arnold staring over at little Ms. Perfect. The only thing Helga and I agreed on – I hated Lila as much as she did. She was just so…phoney and put on. She was too girly even for a girl.

"Okay class. Now we are going to do something extra special." Mr. Simmons announced. The whole class let out a long groan. "Since we are studying the anatomy of a frog, I thought it would be exciting if we looked at a frog up close and personal."

Then Principal Wartz came through the door carrying a bunch of small white boxes. Then I pieced two and two together.

"Don't tell me what I think you want us to do." I said.

"Well, if dissecting dead frogs is what you were thinking, then you hit the bull's-eye!" said Wartz.

The whole class's gag reflex kicked in.

"That is totally gross!" shouted Rhonda.

"Nah-uh, no way." protested Sid with arms crossed.

"Awesome!" said Nadine with great praise.

"Oh come now class, this will be an exciting and special experience for all of you. Now, I'll split you guys into groups of four." Simmons started pointing out across the room, "Group One: Park, Iggy, Robert and Brainy. Group Two: Sheena, Eugene, Nadine and Sid…"

I could see Helga praying in her seat, no doubt hoping to get into Arnold's group.

"Group Three: Arnold, Stephen, Helga…" I could see Helga rejoice in her seat…

"…and Lila." 'Ouch!' I thought. 'Rejected!' The look on Helga's face could make a clown feel miserable.

"Group Four: Harold, Patty, Rhonda and Curly…" Wow, I thought Lila and Helga were a bad mix. Harold likes Patty, Rhonda likes Harold and Curly is a stark raving lunatic in love with Rhonda.

"That leaves Gerald, Phoebe and Stinky for group five. Peapod Kid is out with the flu." 'Poor Stinky, he's gonna be like a third wheel with Gerald and Phoebe.' I thought. "Okay class, and separate!" With a clap of his hands we all scattered into our groups.

Our group was huddled in the farthest part of the classroom in the back right corner. There was so much tension a heavy-duty steak knife couldn't cut it. Arnold in love with Lila, Helga in love with Arnold, Helga and I hated Lila, and Arnold didn't much like my opinions of Lila when I first talked about her; neither was I in Helga's good-books after our first encounter. 'This outta be good.' I thought. They were all like pawns in my experiment. What _would_ happen?

_RIIIIIIIIIIIIING!_

"Oh, fu-fudge that bell! Okay class, we'll start on this after lunch." Simmons confirmed.

"Great," I said, "we'll eat our lunch, and end up losing it later."

o----o

The gang and I made our way to the cafeteria, and as we entered Gerald went to go save us a table. The rest of us went to get our food. I remember watching a lot of cartoons on TV and about how they, in my opinion, exaggerated the awfulness of the cafeteria food. I laughed to myself, until a heavy set lady with a hairnet plopped what looked like to be meat mixed with mashed potatoes on my tray…in a ball.

"Ugh, the cartoons are true. The food _does_ suck."

Arnold once again overheard me, "What did you say, Steve?"

"I said this food sucks! Who agrees with me?" The whole line-up behind me confirmed with a hand up in the air. I got a dirty look from the lunch lady. We then joined Gerald at the table.

"Can you believe what Simmons wants us to do? He's crazy."

"It's not that bad Gerald," the optimist said, "it's not like this is the worst thing in the world to do."

"Arnold," I started, "this is disgusting! I'm not a coroner! I think the dead should be left alone, whether human or animal. If we're not harvesting these frogs' organs to save another frog, I ain't touchin' it!"

"Here, here!" Gerald confirmed, we toasted our chocolate milk boxes in agreement. "But what really sucks even more Arnold, is having Helga Pataki _and_ Lila in your group.

"Tell me about it, Gerald. On one hand I have the girl of my dreams, and then I have the girl of my nightmares."

'Yeah? Well Helga has the boy of her dreams and the girl of her nightmares.' I thought. "I thought you said Helga could be okay when need be?"

"Yeah, but with Lila around I don't think that's gonna happen. I dunno why Helga hates her so much."

'Maybe because Helga loves you and you're hopelessly in love with _her_, you dense little football head!' "Hey Arnold, where are the washrooms around here?" I asked.

"Go out through the cafeteria doors, turn right, then make a left and go down the hall and they're right there."

"Thanks." I said getting out of my seat.

I made my way down via Arnold's directions, but when I was making my left I was suddenly yanked right and slammed up against the lockers. Surprise, it was Helga.

"Hi Helga, hows…-"

"Shut it, shrimp. I don't know who you think you are, but I don't think you're familiar with the ground rules here at PS 118. First off, I'm the boss, got it? I practically own this school…well, the fourth grade part of it anyway. So you better not mess with me bucko!" she ordered with her finger pressing into my chest.

I swiftly pushed her off, resulting in her stumbling back into the lockers behind her, which seemed to disorient her since 'who would dare push _Helga Pataki _around'. I put my one hand up against the locker to block her off, and pointed with my other and stood over her. "You know what, _Helll-ga_? _I_ don't think _you_ should mess with me. You don't scare me one bit. The balls are in my court Helga."

"What the heck does that mean, moron!"

I felt like David Caruso a.k.a. Horatio Caine from the show _CSI Miami_, "It means that your so called _rules_ don't apply. Cause I know things Helga…" I looked at her closely in her dark blue eyes, "…things that could break you and your reputation."

She at once forced my hand out of the way and started to walk down the hallway. "Humphf! You don't know squat, you loser."

As she walked away, I keenly hollered, "You know Helga, I hear the cafeteria is serving _ice cream_ as their dessert today."

Helga stopped dead in her tracks and dropped her books. "Oh, r-really?" she quivered.

"Yeah…" I said as I slowly started walking toward her, her back still turned to me. "Don't you like _ice cream_ Helga?…I like _ice cream_." She struggled to pick up her things, I put my hand on her shoulder and she shot straight up. "In fact, you could almost say I…love _ice cream_. Don't you _love ice cream_,…Helga?" I said into her ear.

"Yea-, yeah, s-sure, whatever floats your boat buddy. I gotta go, get…somewhere!" She ran off like bat out of hell. Without delay I followed up, unnoticed, to where she hid. I heard her pine the love for her football head in the poorly lit dimness of the janitors closest. I could see the silhouette of her and her locket through the door's frosted glass window. I overheard her sweet nothings and took a certain small something from out of my pocket.

"Oh, my beloved knight in shining armor, what has happened? Who is this boy and why does he know my deepest darkest secret? But maybe I'm just paranoid…maybe he _was_ just talking about ice cream…but nobody loves ice cream that much…unless he was talking about _that_ ice cream, the one I would love to hold in my arms on warm starry summer nights. The little football headed love god that has enslaved me with his good looks, compassion and confidence. Oh, Arnold…"

Then I heard a wheezing sound quickly followed up by a shadowy figure getting punched in the face.

"Oh Brainy." I said to myself.


	8. Shake It Up

**(Original Authors Notes)**

Sorry for the delay folks – got busy and sidetracked. I see I only got four reviews on chapter seven – the chapter that was the total basis for my story…meh, I guess my story is more far-fetched than I thought.

To Will: Get your damn site back up, man! Did you get my e-mail? Hit me back! Anywho, maybe I don't understand Helga's character as much as you guys do. Or maybe I just see it in a different light. As for the other characters suspecting me of something…it's coming.

To Jae: Quote, "Dissecting a frog is "distinguishing"?" Whoops, _major_ typo alert! I meant to say "disgusting". Man, I _really_ hope that didn't mess up the story too much! Why am I harassing Helga so much?…because I can! Ha-ha! But there _is_ a reason…I think…I'll have to check ahead to make sure. You _may_ have just given me an idea.

To DarthRoden: Where _do_ _you_ see this going? Please tell; e-mail me if you want to keep it private.

I bet you guys will like this chapter. On another note, go download the hit song "Shake It Up" by The Cars (1981).

o----o

Lunchtime soon passed and we found ourselves in the same predicament; huddling over a deceased frog, deciding who was going to make the first cut. We had to open the thing up and identify certain parts on a chart and then take some notes. As I looked over the classroom, it seemed like we weren't the only ones having trouble. Sid was nearly screaming over at his group.

"I **can't** do this, don't you understand! It's like I'm dissecting my pet frog Sidney!" he exclaimed.

"I'm not doing it, not me," said the squeaky voice of Sheena, "I have made a sacred oath not to harm any of God's creatures."

"I'll do it!" volunteered Eugene.

"No, that's okay!" everyone said, knowing Eugene was a certified jinx. Finally Nadine took a swing at it, and boy did she ever. She acted like the frog was a 50-foot villain attacking the city, jabbing and stabbing it all over the place. Over at group number four, Rhonda looked as if she was going to faint.

"I am **_not_** touching that thing! You think I would want to risk getting anything squirted on this new shirt?"

"But it's the same shirt you always wear Rhonda, and it's still red." Big Patty said in her monotone voice.

"It's _not _the same red, it's a different shade of red." You couldn't even see the difference. "It's all the rage in the UK. Besides, what would _you _know about fashion anyway with those awful 1950's styled saddle shoes?"

"You got a problem, Rhonda?" Patty said as she tightened her fists.

"Now ladies," Harold interrupted," let's just calm down and forget about it." Harold seemed like he was trying to keep the two ladies in his life under control, still remembering what I had said to him earlier. While this was going down, Curly was sniffing Rhonda's hair.

"_Mmmm_, Herbal Essences, very nice."

"Ugh, get away from me you little mutant!" Then she paused and said, "If you dissect the frog, I'll let you smell my hair all you like."

Without hesitation Curly started to slice the amphibian up.

"Fhew!" she said in a sigh of relief, "That…temporarily solves my problem."

Things over at our table weren't any different. Lila, Arnold and I were in a "rock, paper, scissors" standoff until Helga finally took the scalpel from us.

"Sheesh, I'll do it you bunch of wussies."

While Helga was playing operation, Arnold decided to start a conversation with Lila.

"So, how are you today Lila?"

"Oh, I'm sure I'm ever so fine Arnold."

"Gag me." I said.

Arnold ignored my comment and continued to talk with Lila. "Have you read any good books lately?"

"Oh yes, I have read the entire _Harry Potter_ series so far. J.K. Rowling is my ever so favorite author.

"Really? I like those books too. You have great taste, Lila."

I was getting a headache just listening to this crap. "Oh my god, people arguing subjects on a website message board is more exciting then listening to you two talk and attempt a good conversation."

Helga, with her head over the frog let out a little laugh but quickly covered it up.

"I don't believe we have been introduced," she politely replied, "I'm Lila."

"I'm Stephen. Now I'll let you and your _boyfriend_ get back to your 'stimulating' conversation."

"Oh, Arnold isn't my boyfriend."

"_Really?_" I said with heavy sarcasm, "Well, the way he talks about you I beg to differ."

"Shut up!" Arnold elbowed me in my side.

"It's okay Arnold, let…-"

"You know Lila, I have a question for you. Why _don't_ you like Arnold?" I interrogated.

"Well, it's not that I don't like him, it's just…"

"Steve, this is none of your business." Arnold interrupted.

"Sorry Arnold, but the way you have always gone on about her; it's enough to drive anyone up the wall."

"What do you mean 'the way I have always'…?"

"Sixth sense Arnold." I said as I jokingly tapped my nose. "So Lila, is there some _really_ important reason why you won't go out with Arnold?"

Lila began to speak, but Helga kicked her in the leg and gave her a quick "you better shut up" look. As I knew, Lila knew Helga's secret and the kick was just a reminder of the punishment that awaited her if she ever let the cat out of the bag. I knew that was the real reason why Lila wouldn't give Arnold a chance. "I d-don't know, I guess I'm not…I…"

"Can't finish that sentence? Boy Lila, I though you were _ever so_ perfect. Oh, and for your big fat information, stop saying '_ever so_'. It drives everyone nuts."

It was so much fun to mess with everyone. Lila felt awful, Arnold was steaming mad, and Helga kind of seemed happy that I was razzing Lila. But I didn't want Helga to think I was her chum. As everyone was working, I sketched an ice cream cone on a piece of paper.

"That's it, I have had enough of this frog. Hey nerdoid, take this thing." Helga directed.

"What happens if I don't wanna, Helga?" I said as I gave her a quick flash of the drawing I had done. She quickly snapped back her attitude.

"F-fine," she looked to Arnold, "football head, finish this thing."

"You're not the boss, Helga. The least you could do is ask me nicely." he argued, still fuming over this frustrating situation.

"The least I could do is punch you in your big disobedient mouth, football head! Now finish the frog, Arnold!"

"I'm _not_ finishing the frog, Helga!" Like a scene out of the episode "_Girl Trouble"_, they pushed the box with the frog back and forth between them, until the thing flew off the desk and soared across the classroom landing in Rhonda's hair.

"**_AAAIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!_**" she shrieked running around the class, "Get it off, get it off, get it off, get it off, get it off, _get_ _it off!_"

The whole class burst into laughter. Mr. Simmons who was writing on the blackboard turned around. "Group three, are you responsible for this! I'm sorry, but I'll have to give you all detention."

"_What!_" I shouted, "I didn't do anything!"

"You're very correct, Stephen. I saw you in your group and you were just goofing off. No exception, all of you have detention after school."

"Thanks a lot, Arnold-o!" Helga complained.

"Me! You're the one being impossible to work with!" Arnold replied.

Lila just quietly sat in her seat, not wanting to say anything that might spark the topic of her relationship with Arnold. I sat there, very cross at gay-ass Simmons for giving me detention.

o----o

Later on sitting in the detention room, I was thinking maybe I shouldn't have messed with their heads so much. I mean, look where it got me! I thought the tension was bad in Simmons' class. You could hear a pin drop while the four of us sat quietly in detention. When it was over we all went our separate ways, not saying a word to each other. I didn't even want to take the bus, because I didn't want to deal with Arnold's bitching over what I had done to Lila. Hopefully I put a kink in that relationship, cause like many other _Hey Arnold!_ fans I wanted to see Arnold and Helga together with Lila out of the picture…and I would make sure this time, it would be for good.


	9. Link To My World?

**(Original Authors Notes)**

OMG! One review on chapter eight! You're killing me here! I need feedback to make the story better! I'll never get the number of reviews I planned on getting now. Oh well…I'm glad I held out for a review, cause I don't post new chapters until I get some insight on the others. Thanks for your articulate review, Will.

Here's chapter nine in all its glory. This is where I was struggling for ideas to keep the story going. The first eight chapters came out so fast I was stumbling over the keyboard to type them. After that, I never had the same inspiration and the rest of the fic took a _looooong_ while to finish.

o----o

From the bus ride in the morning I had made sure to look around at the surroundings, knowing if I ever needed to walk to the boarding house from PS 118, I knew exactly how to get there and where it was. I walked with knapsack on my back, again viewing the environment, the people, and so forth. I had always seen myself as an observer of people, which came in handy in a world like this.

The city seemed to be winding down for the day. Kids leaving schools to go home and play with friends. Parents would soon be home from work, able to spend time with their families, maybe sit down and watch some TV, eat some dinner. The temperature was warm but the humidity wasn't suffocating. I made my way to the front of the boarding house, kind of wishing I didn't have to see Arnold since he would probably still be cross with me. I entered the house and Phil immediately greeted me, eating a rather large submarine sandwich.

"Oh Stephen, good to see your back. How was your first day at the school?" he said as he spit tiny bits of food at me.

"It was okay I guess, I…-" he cut me off.

"Oh, that's good. Anyway, Arnold is downstairs doing laundry, could you please go and give him a hand?"

"Sure." I said, knowing that I had to do _some_ chores or I may be out on my ass.

I went down to the laundry room where Arnold was working two machines, putting a load of clothes into a washer. Our eyes met, both full of regret and sorry for our actions earlier in the day.

I took off my knapsack and put it on the ground. "Arnold, I'm…"

"Sorry?" he interrupted, "Yeah, I am too. We both went a little stupid back there, didn't we?"

"Yeah." I agreed as I took out a load of clothes from the dryer.

"I recognize your opinions of Lila, and I can't change that, but…why _don't_ you like her?" he probed.

"This really bugs you, doesn't it Arnold?" I sighed, "It's a complicated story. She just seems odd to me, she's too perfect. There are better fish in the sea."

"Oh c'mon, Lila is a nice girl."

"Arnold…it's just the way she carries herself…so girly and such…I dunno, it's hard to explain."

"And besides, what other girls do you have in mind?"

"Uh," I wanted to say Helga, but that would complicate things plenty. I just wanted to drop the subject and let Arnold have the upper hand. "I dunno."

"See what I mean."

Arnold and I started to walk up the basement stairs with a basket of laundry each. "Come to think of it, there really isn't much selection in the way of fourth grade girls at PS 118."

"What do you mean?" he asked as we made our way up the stairs to his room.

"Well, if you pair them up…" I calculated, "You got Sheena and Eugene, Rhonda and Curly, Harold and Patty, Phoebe and Gerald…I mean you see the way they look at each other.

"You're telling me you caught all of that from one day of school?"

"Sixth sense." I said as we entered his room. "Then there's Sid and Nadine, Lila and…well…and then there's Helga…"

Arnold sort of gave me an awkward look. "So?"

"Yeah, Helga…whatever, like she could ever really like anyone, am I right?" I said as I lightly elbowed Arnold jokingly in the arm.

"Y-yeah, sure." he said. I knew he was thinking of what happened between them, but I didn't push on it. It wasn't time yet.

"Hey Arnold!" Phil called from down the hall, "Phone! It's your little friend, Gerald!"

"I'm gonna take this downstairs."

I quickly asked since I had nothing else to do, "Arnold, you mind if I use your computer, surf the net, check my e-mail?"

"Yeah sure," he replied, "just don't give it a virus." he chuckled as he went down the stairs to answer the phone.

I turned on Arnold's computer, which looked as if it hadn't been updated since 1996. It was slow, but finally the Windows 95 boot screen came up.

'Christ Arnold, get with the times.' I thought to myself.

While Arnold's slow ass computer was booting up, curiosity got the better of me and I quietly walked over to Arnold's phone and gently picked up the receiver to listen in on Arnold and Gerald…

"How about that new kid Stephen? It seems that dude has some sort of control over the bullies. I saw him ward of Helga, and we all saw the stuff that went down at recess."

"Yeah, I know Gerald, but doesn't something seem odd about him?"

"Whaddya mean?"

"Well, he sometimes acts really weird, like I dunno, he knows something we don't – and he has to keep it secret. And what about his parents? They haven't called here or anything to make sure he's okay."

"Chill Arnold, he's only been here for a while. I'm sure he's just adjusting."

"I hope so. Oh, I almost forgot about the math homework, what did you get for number four?…"

That's when I noticed the computer was finally done booting up. I gently put the receiver in its resting place and went back to the desk. 'I had better watch myself,' I thought, 'or this could all blow up in my face.'

I got on the Internet, which was as slow as anything, and seeing if it worked, typed in the address of my e-mail provider.

"Wonder if they have Hotmail in this dimension." I asked myself.

And sure enough, the Hotmail page came up. It kind of caught me off guard, and I reluctantly typed in my e-mail address to see what would happen. And sure enough, my account registered and soon I was able to check my mail.

"But…how can this be? I'm in a world of fiction, aren't I? How can I check my own mail if I'm not even in my own world?"

Then, slightly trembling at what would happen, I typed in the address for my _Hey Arnold!_ website, _Arnold's Room_. And sure enough, the page came up as clear as day.

"Oh man, what the fuck?" I nervously said quietly to myself. "How can this be…how can my site exist in this world?" Then, like the ton of bricks that hit me the day before, like something out of _The Outer Limits_ or _X-Files_ or something…I was able to get to my world through the Internet. But how would I use this to my advantage? How could I get this link to my world to work and get me back home?

My thoughts were interrupted as Arnold walked in. "Hey, you havin' fun? What site are you on?"

"_Ahh!_" I quickly turned around and blocked the screen with my body. If Arnold saw my website he would totally flip out of his mind. "Ahum, nothing…it's nothing."

"C'mon, let me see." he said as he walked over.

With my back turned to the screen, I grabbed the mouse with my left hand and moved it around, clicking vigorously searching for the close icon on the browser, hoping I would click it. "No, no, you don't wanna see this page Arnold, it's not suitable for your eyes!"

"Ah, it can't be that bad." As he said that I had successfully clicked on the icon and the webpage was gone.

"No Arnold, it was bad adult stuff, you know. Not till you're older." I said shaking my finger.

"You sound like Grandpa. Besides, you're the same age as me."

"Yeah, sure. More like nine plus ten years." I whispered under my breath.

"What did you say?"

"Nothing, I said nothing."

Arnold raised an eyebrow in suspicion at me, and looked as if he was going to confront me further, but just then…

"Arnold, Stephen, dinner! Pookie made a turkey stuffed with duck stuffed with salmon! Yummy-yummers, good eatin' tonight!" Phil called.

"I'll be down there in a sec, Arnold." I said as he made his way out the door.

I sat quietly at the desk, a little chilling feeling going over my body. Again, asking the plaguing question…how was I going to get home?


	10. Third Times The Charm

**(Original Authors Notes)**

Alright! I got a ton of more reviews! All caught up now, and it feels great to get so much input!

To BrianaLFBH: Wow, you had a lot to say. **Quote:** "You aint no Haley Joel Osmet, buddy, no offense". WTF does that mean? **Quote:** "after the R&J ep she probably ENJOYS all of this fakeness even more!" What are you referring to? **Quote:** "Oh, bad image, VERY bad image..." How old are you? You are one dirty Sunofabitch:). **Quote:** "Seriously, WTF? That was so not even smart! You're nine in this dimension, buddy." Exactly! I wasn't looking at adult stuff, it was just a cover so I'd hope Arnold wouldn't come over and look at the screen! **Quote:** "Yeah, you seriously DO need to watch yourself better. I'd advise story-steve to watch his mouth, okay Cool Steve?" Remember, I still have a 19-year-old brain in the story. It's not like other HA! fics don't have cuss words in them – but with the update of this chapter I up'd the rating to PG-13.

As for everyone else, I am open to all suggestions to make this story longer. I have a perfect spot where I can stick in a chapter or two. Just tell me and I'll see if I can work it in. As for this chapter…no real progress, just messing around.

o----o

(A/n: Chapter name, if you're wondering what it means: third day in Arnold's world, third Helga confrontation.)

I once again awoke on Arnold's couch, tired as ever. I knew I was stressed about finding a way to get home, but Arnold's couch wasn't as comfortable as it looked. I slowly dragged myself out of bed, or couch rather, finding that it was 6:30am on Arnold's alarm clock. Not wanting to try to fall back asleep, I took this time to quietly creep downstairs before the morning rush and sneak in a shower. One thing I expected but didn't think would happen; the water was a light shade of blue, like in all cartoons, when we all know water is transparent in real life. It was funny to me – it looked as if I was being soaked in blue paint, but these people wouldn't know any different. I grabbed some of Arnold's shampoo; the logo had been completely washed off, and started lathering up.

'Mmm, this _does_ smell good.' I thought. 'No wonder Helga loves it so much.'

Not caring about the water bill, I took a really long hot shower, then brushed my teeth and combed my hair out and styled it. I then went to the kitchen and ate some cereal, quietly in the dark since no one had awakened yet. Being the nice guy I am, I quickly made Arnold some French toast and poured some orange juice. 'Better get on his good side.' I thought.

As I walked up to Arnold's room, I could hear his alarm go off.

"_Hey Arnold, Hey Arnold, Hey-_"

Arnold let out a big yawn.

"Hey Arnold." I said as I entered through the door.

"I thought I turned that thing…" then he looked over to me, "Oh hey, what are you doing up?"

"Couldn't sleep, so I made you some breakfast to repay you for all your hospitality. You seem tired too. Looks like you didn't sleep well either."

He took the tray of food and put it on his lap. "Thanks Steve, you shouldn't have. Anyway, I was having this dream. It had Helga in it."

"Again?…I mean, uh, tell me about it."

"Well, Helga and I were having a picnic on the grass in the park. And she was…really pleasant and fun to be around. The Helga I wish she would share with the world, but instead she's always so hateful and frustrated."

"Isn't it funny how you have dreams like this of Helga, but none of Lila?" I examined.

"What do you mean?"

"Well Arnold, they say that dreams are windows to the soul. Spending time with Helga in a dream makes it seem you yearn to spend more time with her in real life. Sounds to me that you sort of…like her, more than you let on."

Arnold was taken back by this statement, "That's crazy. I mean, I like her as a friend I guess, but…ya know."

"No Arnold, I _don't_ know." I said, wanting him to spill the beans about him and her on the roof of FTI.

"Well, uh – oh look, 7:05, we better get going if we don't wanna be late." he said, quickly avoiding the topic.

"Sure Arnold, whatever you say." I said, just going along with him. I knew I would get it out of him sooner or later.

o----o

Being out of school for so long seemed to ruin what schooling skills I had. The same routine all the time: Get up, catch bus, talk to people on bus, classroom, recess, more classroom, lunch, more classroom, more recess, more classroom, then home. I had totally forgotten about the math homework Simmons had assigned the day before, so I quickly did it on the bus. It didn't matter that it was fourth grade math, it was still hard. I always hated math, all my school life, and I was hating it now.

Again I, and other zombies were sitting in class…zombies because Mr. Simmons' teaching was about as much fun as having a tonsillectomy done by an 80-year-old blind cripple. If he said the word 'special' one more time I was going to write the word on a piece of paper and shove it down his throat. And like always, Helga was loving and hating Arnold – spitballs one minute, looking at her locket next.

During one of Simmons' boring lectures, I saw Helga steadily writing something down on a piece of paper. I could hear her sighing every so often, so I knew it was about Arnold. No doubt another enchanting poem about her love for the boy with the football shaped head, which in my opinion looked more like a taco than a football. The bell rang for the first recess and I lazily pushed myself out of my seat in unison with all the others. Simmons was also getting up to leave, probably going on a coffee break. I started to slowly walk to the door, and noticed Helga crumple up the piece of paper she had just written on and throw it into the full garbage pail on her way out by the door. I paused and faked tying my shoelace while the class finally emptied out and I was alone.

There the ball of paper sat, on top of a mountain of others, just begging to be read. Something in cold hard proof, something that I could raise a little hell with. I innocently squatted down and blew a light breath on the paper, and it gently fell to the ground.

"Huh, _what's this?_" I said as if I didn't know what I just done. I quickly scanned the paper "Oh, this is rich."

I then caught up with Helga who was at her locker putting some books away.

"Hi Helga." I said in an Arnold sort of tone.

She jerked around and in the process hit the back of her head on her locker's open door. "Oww…what do _you _want goof-wad?"

"Now Helga, you shouldn't talk to someone like that who knows more about you than you do about yourself."

"Would you shut up! Just leave me alone buddy, or Ol' Betsy will be coming out of retirement."

"Really? Is it '_Ol_' _Betsy_' that just happened to write this?" I held the piece of paper in my hand.

She gasped, and tired to grab the paper but I held it out of her reach. "Tsk, tsk Helga. You think you would have a little more brains to get rid of your '_evidence_' in a more efficient manner than just crumpling it up into a ball and casually tossing it in a garage pail."

"Give it back. Please." she begged.

I started to read a sentence from it, "_Arnold, cherry to my ice cream, oil to my motor, batteries to my discman"_…not really your best work Helga, if I do say so myself."

"Okay, I get the idea. You don't need to rub it in my face."

"But it's _sooooo_ much fun, Helga. Just one Xerox, or scan into a computer could bring your life to a crashing halt."

"You wouldn't."

"I would."

She let out an irritated sigh, "How much?"

"How much ya got?"

Helga rummaged around in her pockets, "Twenty bucks and a coupon for fifty cents off a rack of lamb at Green Meets."

I thought about it for a second. "Done."

We quickly exchanged our items and Helga ran off to the girl's washroom. Yet again I followed her, up to the outside of the door. I could hear the spark of a lighter and the little paper slowly being devoured by flame. Then I heard a flush. She walked out of the door, surprised to see me there.

"Now see Helga, that's the way you get rid of your important papers. I hope this has taught you a lesson." I said with a cheeky smile on my face.

She just gritted her teeth and walked to the doors leading to the playground.

"Don't worry Helga," I said to myself, "I got all the proof I need right here." I said as I tapped my front pants pocket.


	11. The Baseball Game

**(Original Authors Notes)**

Notes: Always remember to R&R if you please! Now that I have written a fic like this, I now know how much I rely on your input so I can improve the story. _REMEMBER_, if you have **any** suggestions on how to make this fic longer, tell me now! This gap between chapters 11-12 is perfect for sticking in another idea to extend it for another chapter or two, but I have none! If you like the story and have an idea, no matter how crazy, mail me.

To Demile: Hey, thanks for all your caught up reviews, they mean a lot! **Quote** "Did you ever find someone to draw you Hey Arnold! style?" No, sadly I didn't. Why? You wanna try? Are you good at art and whatnot, or know someone who is? I would be entirely grateful if someone were to spend all that time on lil' 'ol me. You hate Lila too I see…then I think you'll like this chapter, in my opinion. **Quote** "And you basically just told Arnold you were looking at porn." Yes, but remember, I wasn't! It was a lie so he wouldn't come over to the screen. Wait; maybe that was a bad move! Arnold _is_ a young boy with young boy hormones, LOL!

To everyone: Hmm, chapter 10 really didn't seem to go over well with some readers. Maybe I don't know the characters like I should know them. I dunno, I feel I have a different take and opinion on the series, which is usually more negative, but whatever. If it was Harold or Rhonda harassing Helga, it may have fit better – but maybe because it's a new, different character doing it, which is me, it didn't work.

Well, I have to say I was inspired by Willy D's baseball chapter in his incredible "What Is And What Should Never Be" fic (that I REALLY want him to update soon!) to write my own "fun times" chapter. Tell me if it makes the grade. This is the longest chapter of the story so far; six pages in a Word document – seven with all my "notes".

o----o

"Another school day, another batch of homework." I said to Arnold as we walked out of Simmons' class. The day was finally over.

"Tell me about it. Math, spelling _and_ English. For a person who drives a motorcycle with pink flower stickers all over it, he sure can dish it out." he said as we made our way out the doors to the outside of the school."

As we waited for Gerald, Arnold asked, "What do you wanna do?"

"Other than kill Simmons for all the homework, I dunno. I really haven't taken the time to relax and do stuff around here."

"Well, there's the arcade, the mall, the blowing alley, the cinema, Tina Park. They opened up a new skateboard park just a couple blocks from here."

"No thanks Arnold, I'd rather not break my neck today."

Then Gerald came bursting through the doors running towards us.

"What is it Gerald?" asked a concerned Arnold.

"Big news, Arnold. The fourth grade class over at PS 119 has challenged us to the ultimate baseball game to end _all_ baseball games. My man Fuzzy Slippers told me everything, and I heard that class over there has taken the gold three years in a row in the youth league baseball teams. We are talking some _serious_ competition!"

"Is there anything _really_ at stake here?" I asked.

"_Just the pride of PS 118 is all!_" Gerald said wide-eyed as he gripped his hands on my shoulders. "They told us to meet them at Geraldfield at 5pm."

"Sounds like a challenge. You in Steve? We need all the players we can get for this match."

"Sure Arnold, but I must warn you I kinda suck at all sports…except bowling and mini golfing."

"You call those _sports_?" Gerald commented.

"Hey, no problem, it's just a friendly game Steve."

"Tell that to the champions over at PS 119." added Gerald.

o----o

It was one of those perfect summer days. Not too hot, not too cold, just perfect for an evening game of baseball. It was one of those really long summer days, where at 5pm the sun was still far away up in the sky (_You guys know what I mean right?_). It was just perfect. All the fourth graders from PS 118, and I mean _everyone_ you could imagine, were there getting ready for the game. Gerald was tidying up the field while some were standing around talking, others stretching and exercising to get ready. I sat on the bleachers among other school kids. I said I would go in as an extra; as baseball…or any other sport involving any physical endurance and strength, I really blew at. Like I heard from a _Simpsons_ episode once, "It's more fun to watch stuff, than to do stuff."

"It's 5:05 Gerald, are these guys gonna be here or what!" Helga yelled over at Gerald.

"Don't worry unibrow, they'll be here, don't you worry." And as if on cue, a bunch of kids in a rather large herd came over the horizon, casting long shadows as they marched. They all had very serious looks on their faces, almost like an army of robots.

'Oh shit, this oughta get ugly.' I thought.

All the kids were different sizes and builds, like mirrored clones of the PS 118 gang. Sort of like in the "_Arnold Visits Arnie"_ episode but not as much so. A tall kid with a unibrow came over to Gerald.

"You ready to get this thing underway?"

"Let's do this thing!" Gerald exclaimed.

"Let's play ball!" Helga yelled from the catcher's mound.

"_Play ball!_" everyone cheered.

As the game started to get underway, that atmosphere of fun and excitement came over the place. I looked around, and it seemed everything was in slow motion. The fans cheering, people running the bases, the ball flying throughout the air. It just felt good to be with people, and you wish the moment could last forever…I knew I should of brought a camera, it was a Kodak moment in every sense of the word.

So the game went on and soon we were in the third inning. I was still in the bleachers, cheering on. Helga was sitting a row below me, now out of the game because everyone was trying to be rotated in. Arnold got up to bat, everyone went nuts.

"Oh, my love, hit it out of the park." she sighed.

'Pssh. You're telling me nobody else heard that but me?' I thought. One thing I always noticed in cartoons; a person could speak out a secret of some sort, and someone could be right beside them and not hear it.

Arnold had a confronting half-lidded look on his face. He stood in his awkward batting stance and awaited the pitch. One pitch and _BAM!_ – Arnold hit a homer that brought in three runs and brought the score up to 5-3 for PS 118. After Arnold had run the bases he was greeted by Lila.

"Oh Arnold, that was just an ever so great home run!"

"Thanks Lila, it's no big deal."

"Big deal? Arnold, we're winning now because of you. I must say I really admire your baseball skills."

"Well, thanks Lila." Arnold was starting to blush.

Both Helga and I at the same time bitterly said, "Ugh, give me a break." Then she looked up at me and I looked down at her. I was almost going to look away and cross my arms like we were sworn enemies but then she asked…

"Wait, why'd _you_ say that?"

Like taking a page out of Helga's vocabulary, I replied, "Not that I'm getting all chummy with you, _bucko_, but that Lila chick is about as exciting as the gum on the bottom on my shoe."

Helga laughed a bit at that comment. "Really? I had no idea you despised her as much as I did."

"C'mon Helga…I mean, she has no personality. Like a drone of Barbie-corporate America, all dolled up and pretty looking and girly-girly. And you hear the way _they_ talk…"

"Yeah, hearing them carry on a conversation is as exciting as watching grass grow."

We both laughed, sharing in a moment of somewhat companionship.

Then Helga said, almost giving in that I knew about her secret, "I don't know what Arnold could ever see in that girl. She's such a…"

"Boring, prissy skirt wearing, sugar sweet talking bimbo for leading him on like a dog on a leash?" I added. "Arnold in my opinion is a stupidly blind, no-good-love-sick-fool, all bent out of shape because of that counterfeit, stuck-up twit Ms Perfect. I agree with you on this one Helga, Lila _sucks_. She just does and that's all there is to it. But that's all I'm agreeing on with you Helga, I'm not your friend or anything here." I said just make sure she knew we were on the same page.

Helga as well, quickly snapped her wall of defence back up. "Yeah well, same to you buddy."

o----o

And the war raged on. Both teams were not willing to give in or be intimidated by the other. All kids were giving 110 percent, except Eugene who somehow hit himself in the face with the bat and had to be sent home. Everyone was dirty and sweaty…having the time of their young lives. I looked on with eyes of somewhat regret. I knew I was young again here, but I would give anything to be young in my world again. And on that note, to live in a place like this – where as cheesy as it sounds, a place '_where everybody knows your name_.' I never had friends like these, nor a baseball field like this to flaunter away my youth on exuberating baseball games. I somehow wished I could stay here forever, I _wanted_ to…but knew it just couldn't be. It was a very bittersweet feeling.

It was now getting really late, about 9pm. It wasn't totally dark out yet, you could see the remains of the sun as its rays shone across the city creating an orange landscape full of dark shadows. Some kids had left, which put me in a predicament, because I was hoping I wouldn't have to play. I know I was being hard on myself, but I just really sucked at sports. Then Arnold came running over to me.

"Steve, we need you in man. The score it tied at 12-12 and we need a hitter."

"But Arnold, I totally blow at sports."

"Look Steve, you can do it. Just focus on the ball, think positive thoughts and you'll be fine."

"But…"

Arnold wouldn't have it. "No buts, go out there and show 'em what you're made of!"

"You know you're too optimistic for your own good." I said to him jokingly as I got up to bat.

"It hasn't steered me wrong yet." he replied.

So there I was at bat. Typical dramatic cartoon set-up: bottom of the ninth, score tied, bases loaded, two outs. Being the couch potato I was, I knew that 50 percent of the time the person smacked it out of the park, being cheered on by his peers. But that still left the other 50 percent that would leave me strike out, and get mocked and shunned by everyone. I had to swallow the growing lump in my throat.

"C'mon Steve, you can do it!" Arnold yelled.

I would have given anything to get out of the spot I was in. But what could I do? I planted my feet, spit and grabbed my crotch.

In the background I heard Sid state, "Who does this guy think he is, Roberto Alomar?"

The pitcher, a muscle-built guy with short brown hair gave me a low browed lidded look and let the first ball fire. I almost wanted to run at the speed it was coming at. I swung…

"Strike one!"

"Crap." I said. The crowd was going insane.

The second pitch came, a curve ball, and I took another swing…

"Strike two!"

"Double crap." I said.

People in the stands started chanting my name, I had every chance to make this moment my own. I quickly thought 'God, if there is one where I am, please make this happen for me.'

I got ready for the final ball. Two strikes, one more and I would be run out of town with pitchforks and torches. A silence hush fell over the crowd as they leaned in with anticipation. I was sweating like no tomorrow, it was hard for me to keep a good grip on the bat. "_Stephen! Stephen! Stephen!_" was all that echoed through my brain. The pitcher got ready to throw, I dug my feet into the ground and gave him the dirtiest look you ever did see. He brought his arm back, kicked up his leg, and fired…

I closed my eyes and swung the bat the hardest I ever swung anything before. I used all the muscle I could muster and…

_**CRACK!**_

The ball slammed into the wooden bat with such a tremendous force it took all my strength to put that force back out into the ball to send it flying. The baseball shot off like a rocket, out of Geraldfield and over a couple blocks. In the distance you could hear a car screech and crash.

"Run you dolt!"

"Oh yeah!" Helga reminded me. I took my run around the bases, all the while having the Queen song "_We Are The Champions"_ going through my head. I almost couldn't reach the home base because people were crowding all around me. They picked me up on their shoulders, I never felt so accepted in all my life. I would miss it, this moment. The other team slowly walked away in defeat, our team razzed them on. The streetlights were now starting to come on. But nobody cared.

"C'mon everyone, we're going to Slausen's, I'm buying!" That twenty bucks Helga gave earlier me came in handy.

Everyone was excited as we walked down the street into the setting sun. What a great end to a summer's day.

o----o

Later on Arnold, Gerald and I were walking to the boarding house, our faces dirty with milkshakes and ice cream.

"Man, that was one heck of a game guys. It will truly go down in Geraldfield history."

"Definitely Gerald, and our star hitter Steve here will be remembered forever."

"Ah guys, it was nothing…I guess in this world…I mean country…I dunno, home team advantage I guess." I said as we were at the stoop of the boarding house. Just then Phil pulled up along side of the house, with the Packard's front end all mashed in.

"Grandpa, what happened, are you alright?" asked Arnold.

He got out of the car, slightly ticked off. "Yeah, I'm fine. I had to go out and get some more groceries because that sneak Oskar raided the fridge again. So I'm driving down to the store and out of nowhere this baseball comes flying at me! I swerved out of its way and slammed into a milk truck…which was sort of ironic because milk was on my list. So what did you boys do today?

"Ahh, we, uh…" Arnold stuttered.

"Played checkers sir," I said, "a nice full contact sport of checkers."

"Full contact, eh? Mmmm, I've never heard of it…yet I still remember playing it," he said as he rubbed his chin. "Oh well, it's getting late, you boys have to wash up and get ready for bed."

"Okay Grandpa, see you tomorrow Gerald."

"See ya man." They did their handshake. "Awesome work today Steve."

"Twern't nothing," I said, "have a good night."

Later on Arnold and I got ready for bed. It had been a long day; it was almost 11pm by the time we got to bed. I'd usually go to bed later, but my young body was really whacked out. Phil offered to drive us to school tomorrow morning so we could sleep in for a bit. I felt so superior, so popular, so accepted…and yet at the same time, so alone, so concerned, so worried – that lurking, remaining feeling came back again, that brought all my emotions to a halt: that I didn't belong here. The more important question now was…what _was_ my purpose here?

'Why _was_ I sent here?' I pondered this as I went to sleep on the couch, also wondering what tomorrow would have in store for me.


	12. The Fourth Wall

**(Original Authors Notes)**

One and a half pages of notes: Wow, do I ever feel like a jerk. Sorry for the delay folks, everything around me has just been chaos. I had a car accident that left with me no money and a heavy load of depression that I am still going through. My place of work was floored with customers during the holiday season (I worked over 13 hours on New Years, I didn't get out till 1:15am). This story was the last thing on my mind – I was _so_ busy. Plus I have a lot of computer related shit to do. My Windows '98 has really been acting up and I haven't re-installed since November 2002. I hate my computer, it is such a piece of crap!

Another reason for the delay – I wanted to stick in another couple of chapters. I looked in to other people's ideas, but just had NO TIME to expand on them at all. I looked over everyone's quite carefully; some worked for this story and some would be the good basis for another fic. All I can say is I am sorry it took so long to get back, and I hope I haven't lost my audience, because I _REALLY_ hope I can push at least **100** reviews – that's my goal, because I probably won't write another chapter story like this for a while. Ten reviews a chapter would do it. Getting back to old comments…

Jae: _You had me LMAO at the baseball scene! There's just one thing I'd like to ask. If the gang's in school, how can it be a "summer day"?  
_Wow, I never thought of that. Well, I guess the story could be set in late June I suppose.

Demile: _I do indeed draw. In fact here is a few samples of my Hey Arnold! drawings.  
_How is it going with those drawings for this story? I will be shooting you a mail soon.

Comments concerning my "Welcome To My Life" one-shot…  
Will: _Well, technical stuff out of the way, this was very well-written. You had a few misspellings with the use of "meet" and "meat," and "self-suicide" is a redundancy, but nothing to complain about.  
_By the way, thanks for the kudos. Yes, I notice my story does have _some_ stuff that really would never happen in real life, but hey – its fiction. I never noticed I overused "self-suicide" – in fact, I only used it once in the story.

Benji's Riot Girl: _BTW, I love the song too, by Simple Plan. I recommend the new CD, if you don't already have it. There are songs I turn to in rough times, they could help you too. Simple Plan is one of my favorites, even though I perfer Good Charlotte  
_It's funny; every time I hear "Welcome To My Life" on the radio it reminds me of my fic. I have Simple Plan's old album, I like it – but it's almost too much teenage angst – but I still like it. I was almost gonna pick up Good Charlotte's 2002 release, but I found it was far too redundant and whiny about drunken fathers beating up wives and leaving the family. They do have some good singles though.

MDT: _Do something, man! Enter a writing contest or something!  
_Wow, _I'm_ getting praise from the person who I think is one of the greatest fic writers out there? That's crazy, but I thank you for your words of praise. And Shaun…**FOR THE LOVE OF CHEESE, ANSWER MY MAIL! I WANNA GET THAT NEW FIC UP! OYE!**

Now, I would like to highlight an idea that was good, but just wouldn't fit into my fic…  
_You could talk Helga into going out with you... threaten to tell her secrets if she doesn't... Make Arnold really jealous... brag to him after some dates... "she is so sweet deep down" "I knew that was a really good person underneath it all... I knew I would be able to get her to come out from hiding behind her bully-ish personality" Arnold has always wanted to tear down her rough exterior and see the sweet Helga within, him thinking that someone beat him too it would make him totally flip out and probably attempt to get in the way of your and Helga's "relationship"  
_This is a good idea, because I like her character. Her spunk, her flare, her "in your face" attitude. She can look good when she cleans herself up. Yet I am so pro A&H I wouldn't want to fuck with the relationship dynamics that much. I don't know if I would want to tell Arnold how sweet she is – it could leak out to other peers – plus he already knows that, or at least he _should_. This is a good idea and I'll _see_ if I can re-tool it for another story.

I worked all day on January 7th to get this chapter out. Mainly an idea I expanded on from someone at my site's message board (sorry, I can't remember who). I think it veers off the main story a little, but I am mainly pleased on how it turned out. Just a wacky little chapter. If there are spelling errors, tell me! Then on January 8th – I was like WTF is this! Second time in a row I go to upload my story – I'm eager and want to get my stuff out there because I work so hard, and fanfiction dot net is having more problems! I can't log in! Of all the rotten GD luck!

o----o

The next day was the same old grind. Got up, got dressed, ate, and Phil drove us. Even though Arnold and I got a good sleep, we still didn't feel fully rested. As we entered the halls of PS 118 you could still hear about the game that happened the day before lingering on in people's conversations.

The whole fourth grade class was even more inattentive as usual. Everyone pretty much had their heads on their desks. Guess everyone didn't sleep that well either. Helga was too tired to even torment the ol' football head. Rather she fell asleep, and through her 'oohs' and 'aahs' she was probably dreaming about Arnold.

Recess finally came. All the kids slowly made their way to the playground. Everyone pretty much went looking for a bench to sleep on. Even though everyone else was worn-out, my thoughts about this place were still as brisk as ever. I still had so many unanswered questions about Hillwood; about the places, the urban tales, the people…

It was then when I noticed Gerald in a far off corner of the playground near the school building. He was talking to someone, but the person in question could not be seen because they were standing out of view just around the corner of the brick wall. My eye caught something on the ground and I squinted to see what it was. Peeking out from behind that corner wall looked to be the tip of a…

"…fuzzy slipper…?" I said to myself.

Could it be? The fabled all knowing Fuzzy Slippers of Hillwood City was right here at the school talking to Gerald, probably filling him in on the latest news and info from across the tri-city area. But who was this person? Where did he come from?

"Strike one question off the list." I said as I ran over to Gerald. "Hey big G, wazzup?"

"Steve!" He was caught off guard. The puzzling slipper ducked from the corner and into the shadows. "Uh…hey, man. Nothing is up, same ol' thing, you know what I'm sayin?"

"Really, because it doesn't look like nothing." I said inquisitively, looking over his shoulder inspecting the area where the phantom-like figure had just been standing. "Seems odd you are here all the way on this side of the playground all alone," I peered at him strangely, "talking to someone?" I asked as I walked around him.

"No, no," he said, but you could tell he had something to hide. "Just…uh, rehearsing some lines for the next school play. Yeah, I come over here to rehearse my lines in peace, away from all the schoolyard racquet."

"Funny, I don't recall any school productions coming up." I was now circling him, "It's news to me, what is it called?"

"Uh…it's called…"

It was then that I noticed Gerald had his hands behind his back, and it looked as if he was signalling something…or someone. I instantly looked to where the signal was being broadcast too. The shadowy figure was running off…he wasn't going to get away that easily. I took off running.

"Hey, Steve! Get back here, man! You ain't allowed to be off school property during recess!"

I didn't care, not all the rules applied to me in this world, I wasn't really a student there anyway. "Talking to yourself, eh! We'll see about that!" I yelled back to him as I continued to run.

"Don't do this Steve, some things are better left unknown!" he hollered in the distance.

It was too late, I was catching up to the running body, which I could start to see now. They wore pink fuzzy slippers and a long hooded black robe. I chased them for blocks, through abandoned stores and alleyways. Soon, to my luck, the eerie individual hit a dead end in an alleyway with a wooden fence too high to jump over. I had the victim cornered. They had their back to me.

"Ha…ha…I finally…caught…you now, Fuzzy Slippers." I panted, "Now, who are you?"

The person said nothing, did nothing. Their fists were tight and firm, almost ready to fight.

"I got you cornered, man…just give it up, who are you?"

The fists became un-clenched, and the individual gradually turned around. I couldn't see a face within the dark black hood.

"Reveal yourself at once!" I commanded, although I'll admit I had no idea what I was doing.

The person in question, without saying a word brought his hands up to his hood, and slowly pulled it down to expose their face. I couldn't believe it.

"**_ROBERT!_**" I shouted loud enough for the whole town to hear. "You're…you're Fuzzy Slippers?"

"Indeed I am."

"But why Robert, why?"

"Why not Steve, it's the perfect cover up. I barely get noticed at that school. I am a geek, an outcast that refuses to conform to the mainstream society. You've seen _Hey Arnold!_, I only got ONE speaking line throughout the entire series. '_Is this chair occupied?_' Ha, _not anymore it isn't!_" he said with an evil cackle.

"But why would you…wait a minute, _Hey Arnold!_? What the fuck are _you_ talking about?"

"Oh come now, Stephen," he said as he circled around me, "I am Fuzzy Slippers, I know all. I know there is another world out there Steve, the fourth wall that divided our two worlds. You somehow broke down that one wall and you have ended up here, in Hillwood City."

"But…wha…uhm." I couldn't say a thing, I was speechless.

"I know all about you Stephen, I know about your website, about you really being a teenager – I know where you really came from. I know in your world, our world is nothing but a 2-D flat screen animated fictional wonder-world. If you ask me, you are really the animated character and we are the ones who are real!" he pointed.

"You're crazy!" is all I could blurt out.

"Am I?" he coyly said. "Maybe you just think that because you are now the mouse and I am the cat. I have seen you on the school grounds Steve, using what you know to harass the students at PS 118. There can only be one person who is the Fuzzy Slippers in this town, and that's me! I have worked too hard, studied too long, and built too high my knowledge to become who I am now! Nobody will ever suspect Robert, one of the many 'extras' of the series and the quietest geek of the school to be the all knowing Fuzzy Slippers. You know too much Steve, and now you have solved one of the greatest mysteries of the town and series.

"Whaddya going to do? You can't kill me or anything."

"True…" he said as he tapped his chin, "Nickelodeon wouldn't like that sort of thing on a kids show. But hear this Steve," as he approached me face to face, "don't go trying to figure out anymore of Hillwood's little secrets. The fourth wall is far too fragile and anymore disturbance could cause a cataclysmic eruption of forces that you know nothing of."

"But? _What?…_"

He jumped onto some nearby garbage bins by the fence and put his hood back on. "All I can say to you is that you were sent here for a reason, and you will return to your world once you have finished your quest here." With that, he jumped over the fence and out of slight.

"Hey, get back here! What's my quest!"

I slowly walked out of the alley into the sunny and busy street. I was nothing but bewildered. Was what he said about everything true? What about that 'fourth wall being unstable' garbage? A part of me believed him, but a lot of me thought he was just spitting out total bullshit to cover up the fact he actually didn't know all. But one thing was for sure, I was not alone in knowing about my world, and hopefully no one else would find out either.

I then looked at my watch to find recess ended ten minutes ago.

"Crap!" I said as I huffed it back to the school. Just as I thought, the playground was as desolate as a desert. I crept back into the school, making sure not to get caught by Wartz about being in the halls during class. I made my way back to room 206 thinking about what exactly I was going to say to make up for my lateness back from recess. I knocked and slowly opened the door.

"Oh Stephen, there you are," Mr. Simmons greeted, "Gerald told me you had to go to the nurse's office because you weren't feeling well."

I looked over at Gerald who gave an obscured wink and nod. "Yeah, I'm feeling okay now, it must have been something I ate."

"Well take a seat, you are just in time as we start our math unit."

"_Great_." I said to myself bitterly as I took my seat.


	13. Evasive Manoeuvres

**(Original Authors Notes)**

Notes: Hello again everyone. Having a _really_ slow season at work right now (a job I _HAVE_ to quit, I can barley make car insurance) so I thought, "what the hell, let's get another chapter out there!" I see I'm up to 64 reviews…good, good. If I can hit at least 100 and pull of 10 reviews a chapter, I'll have reached my "goal" so to speak.

Number6: Ah, so you are the person who came up with the idea of Fuzzy Slippers! Glad to see you liked how I wrote it out. **Quote** _Now we know why he is in all the chapters, but only says "Is this chair occupied?"._ What? I don't get what you're saying here. By chapters do you mean episodes? And…is that exactly what he says from that episode? If so, I used the wrong wording and will have to fix that. As for your other ideas, they are quite good. Truth be told I have forgotten some of those mysteries. It sucks – HA! doesn't air on YTV anymore, and I'm starting to lose my grasp on the series and characters. Anyway, your ideas could be a good basis for another fic that _if_ I have time, may tackle.

Amelia Badelia: **Quote** _Dude, is your title misspelled?_ WTF? I'm lost here, what do you mean. Everything seems to be correct as far as I can see. Am I missing something?

Jae: **Quote** _I'm starting to wonder if 'Steve' took a little 'ecstacy' that fateful night he fell into the HA! world!_ LMFAO! That's funny. Maybe there was something more in that late night pizza then I let on :) **Quote** _but keeping the identity withheld tends to hold the reader's interest._ Yeah, I can understand where you are coming from, but the whole reason for that chapter was to have a little fun with who Fuzzy Slippers could be.

Will: **Quote** _I love how epic this story just became, it's a great transition from some guy's fantasy to the fate of the world riding on the story's outcome, lol. Um, just one grammar note, don't use "they" when referring to one person. I know everyone says "they" to mean "he or she" and you wanted to keep the figure as mysterious as possible, but it would have been better to just use "he." OK, now I'll get back to writing on my own fic_

Wow – my story is an epic? Thanks for the comment; my only gripe though is I _WISH_ I could make it longer, like 25 or 30 chapters. But I really don't have the brainpower or time (computer wise) to complete such a task. I used "they" a lot because I didn't want to spill the beans if Fuzzy Slippers was a girl or guy before I revealed the identity. Yes – go back and write more "What Is!" I'll still be here waiting…

o----o

If there was one subject that made one hour feel like three, it was definitely math. All this 'multiply by the number two divided by eight to the power of five while you subtract the total value of _xyz_ from _abc_.' My math textbook looked as if it were written in Japanese, because I didn't understand a freakin' word of it. Finally, and with good relief, lunch came and I made my way out of the classroom to my locker where I was planning on eating lunch outside. Of course, Gerald pulled me over for a quick chat.

"Man Steve, you are one _lucky_ kid. You know I just pulled your butt out of the fire known as the principal's office? You know what Wartz would have done to you if he had caught you? You'd be better to take off back home to Canada because you sure as hell couldn't show your face again in these parts!"

"I know, Gerald, I know. I was surprised you didn't let me burn. I'm sorry, and I thank you _majorly_ for what you did. You're a good guy."

He crossed his arms and eyed me briefly, "So? Is that it?"

"Um…thank you times…a zillion?"

"No, no, I don't mean that. Was it worth chasing down Fuzzy Slippers half way across town? Did you even catch him?"

"Yeah, I caught up with him…" I didn't know if Gerald actually knew who Fuzzy Slippers _really_ was, so I laid off using '_his_' real name, "I…just had some information for him, that's all."

"Well, I'm not going to rag on you _too_ much for that, but remember, I'm his right hand man for delivering what he knows out to the masses. I just wanted you to know that, we have a tight contract for swapping info. Next time if you have something you haveta tell him, come through me first, okay?"

"I totally respect that Gerald. Believe me, I won't be tracking him down anytime soon."

Just then Robert walked by with his lunchbox and shot me down quite the glare.

"How ya doin' there, Robert?" I kindly offered, but he just continued on his way. I turned my attention back to Gerald "That kid is such a weirdo."

"Yeah, a complete nobody. He never speaks a word. Anyway, I'll catch you later, I'm meeting up with Phoebe for lunch." he winked.

"Right on, see you later." I winked back, and made my way outside to the sunny playground. It seemed that Gerald was also in the dark about who Fuzzy Slippers _really_ was. I guess Robert even kept his real identity hidden from his right hand man. What a strange and secretive odd boy.

I scanned the grounds for a place to sit and enjoy the perfectly temperatured day. I made my way to the jungle gym again and met up with some of the kids there. That's when I noticed Arnold talking to Lila near the swings…no doubt he was trying to have his way with her. After a bit Arnold came over to where we were to hang out, probably being shot down for the one-hundredth time. I for one had just had it. I pushed my tuna-fish pepperoni egg-salad sandwich (if you guessed Pookie made it, 100 points for you) aside. It was time to change things.

When no one was looking, I made my way over to the picnic table where Lila was eating a snack.

"Hello, Lila." I said, trying to hide the fatigue in my voice. That run around the town ran me down.

"Oh, hello Stephen." she said as she looked up from her crackers, kind of surprised to see me.

"Look Lila, I'll cut to the chase."

"Whatever do you mean?"

"You have _got_ to stop leading Arnold on like this, okay? I know you're trying to be friends with him, but every time you try to be friendly…he thinks you really like him."

She looked at me for a moment, letting what I said sink in, and gave me a confirming look. "I know Stephen, I know, I just don't know what to do."

"Look, you have to lay it on the line. Just tell him to stop. Cause you know as well as I do there's someone else for him."

"Wait, do you mean…?"

I gave her a nod of my head.

"But how do you know?"

"I just do, okay. And don't bother telling her I know cause she knows I know, you know?"

"Yeah, I guess. But how did _you_ find out?"

"That's not important, Lila. What _is_ important is that you have to let the football head off the hook for good so he can realize his feelings for…_her_."

"Okay, Stephen, I'll try ever-, I mean, I'll do my best."

o----o

The day crawled on and finally another school day came to a close. Gerald and some of the other kids went to go hang out at the arcade. While I had just left the school and was standing on the stairs of the entrance, I saw Arnold walking Lila home. Without Arnold's knowing, Lila looked up at me and I gave her a confirming nod and she did the same, as if to say, "The plan is underway". I myself had nothing to do, so I decided to go for a stroll.

I was walking only a couple blocks away from the school when I heard something…some noise coming from an alley. I peered around the corner of the building and it was Helga, going on blissfully about her love for Arnold, thinking no one was around…well _I_ was. I crept up behind her almost Brainy style.

"Hi Helga."

"Eeep!" she whipped around.

"Pretty odd place to be in the middle of the afternoon Helga, in a dark and dirty alley. Wha'cha doin'?"

"Nothing, nothing at all. I-I, just thought I lost something here yesterday and was, uh, trying to find it, he-heh." Just then her locket fell out of her dress and onto the ground.

"Man Helga, you're really letting your game slip," I said as I picked up the locket and let its chain dangle on my index finger. "I don't know why you keep putting yourself through this torment."

"P-put myself through what, I don't know what you're talking about." she said as she swiped the locket off my finger and stashed it away, turning her back to me.

"Oh yeah," I said as I reached into my pocket, "maybe this will refresh your memory."

"_Oh, my believed knight in shining armor, what has happened? Who is this boy and why does he know my deepest darkest secret?…_"

Helga slowly turned around and took a look at what was in my hand. It was the microcassette recorder I had used the day she was in the janitor's closet to tape her secret adoration about her love. I knew that device would come in handy.

"_…unless he was talking about that ice cream, the one I would love to hold in my arms on warm starry summer nights…_"

Helga was stunned, but then got very peeved. "What is your deal Steve-o? You literally come out of nowhere, start making all these threats at me, and you somehow know my _secret_ and start taunting me with it, making my life a living hell…" Then she started to get teary eyed. She sat down on the ground with her back up against the side of the building. "I mean, why can't you leave me alone? What do you want? Why are you doing this to me?" Now she was really starting to sob.

I walked over and sat down next to her, gently put my hand on her shoulder and spoke in the sincerest voice I could, "Helga, why are you doing this to yourself?"

She looked up at me, taken aback from the sudden change of tone in my voice.

"You know what I want, Helga? I want the best for you and Arnold. I want you two to be together, you're the perfect match. Sure, you may be opposites in every meaning of the word, but I think that you two have a deep, mutual connection."

"What? B-but, but why? You don't even know…you don't know what it's like…"

"Helga, you can't go on like this, it's making you a wreck. You have to take the bull by the horns. You know he'll never come around on his own, he's too shy. It may be years before he makes a move – because I bet dollars to donuts he feels that same mutual connection, but needs time to sort out his jumbled mess of feelings. You've got to do it, Helga. I know that sounds unfair since you already did it once, but you have to make him see the light."

"Did it once? Wait a minute, how do you know about…"

"Helga, I just do. I'm not going to go into a long winded story, I just do."

There was a moment of silence. She didn't know what to say. She knew I hit the nail on the head, but seemed to be bewildered about how I came across her secret. But she didn't fight it, and just gave in.

"But…what happens if he, doesn't accept it. Maybe he doesn't love-…"

"Helga, you're your own worst enemy! You'll never know if you don't try. Do it for me, do it for you, do it for all the other Helga's out there that love someone and long for that person to love them back."

She sighed and looked at the ground, totally distraught, mixed up in a world of feelings and compromised emotions. She took out her locket and looked at it compassionately, her thumbs caressing his picture encased within the glass covering. The tears welded around the lower part of her eyes, drops splashing on the filthy ground. I felt so sorry for her.

"All I want to do is help you, Helga. Help you to help yourself to do the right thing."

She looked up at me with such big teary, almost puppy dog like eyes. She then wiped the tears from her face and slowly got up and started to walk away.

"I don't know what I'll do Steve…but thanks for the ear, it was nice to talk to someone about it. You're a better kid than I gave you credit for."

I gave her a tiny nod of my head with a smile and she walked around the corner and out of my sight. I had faith she would do the right thing. Moreover, I had just realized what I had done. I was one of the few people that had broken that 'bank vault' like wall Helga kept around herself and tapped into her true nature. Things were definitely going my way.

o----o

It was about 4pm by the time I got to the Sunset Arms. The wind outside had picked up greatly and was fiercely blowing against my body as I walked. I was exhausted; I would sleep well tonight, despite Arnold's lumpy couch. I made my way up to Arnold's room where he was sitting on his bed, tossing a baseball around in his hand, as if he was waiting for me.

"Hey Arnold, what's up?"

"What's up? _What's up!_ I tell you _what's up_ Steve. I walked Lila home today and had quite an interesting conversation with her."

"Really, what about?" playing it cool as if I did know.

"I asked her to the movies and she shut me down…again…"

"Shouldn't you be used to that by now?" I said with somewhat of a smirk as I set my school bag on the couch.

"But it was different this time Steve. She then said I had to stop it, trying to make her 'like me-like me'. She said she wants me to move on – for once and for all."

"So what?"

"So _what!_ I saw you talking to her at recess today Steve, what did you say to her!"

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"I think you do Steve, I know you don't like her, and you think she's a total ditz (Heh, he said it, not me). But you know what, that's not even the tip of the iceberg! I checked my Internet history Steve," he said as he got on the computer, "What the hell is this!" He pointed angrily at my Arnold's Room homepage. "There are pictures here from events that happened months, even years ago, in my _personal_ life." He said as he went through the picture gallery, full of pictures of him with other people in numerous locations.

"Well, I…"

"What's your deal…_Stephen Pace_?" Oh great, now he was sounding like Helga, "You come out of thin air, act all weird and secretive, and seem to have this eerie control over the kids at PS 118. What do you know? And why is there a website with pictures of me and my friends? Who are you really, where did you really come from? Where the heck are your so called _parents_…?"

"Arnold, you wouldn't believe me if I told you!"

"Try me."

"You _really_ wanna know Arnold? The honest to god truth?"

"Hit me."


	14. When It All Hits The Fan

**(Original Authors Notes)**

Well I'll tell you; this is quite the angry update. For one, my title was spelt wrong and it's been like that ever since I made the story in December 2003! _SEE_! I don't know why I never caught it – it's like my eyes saw it and got used to reading it as "realities". This is what happens when you read the same thing _over_ and _over_. I bet the story is full of errors everywhere and I don't even see them, and there's nothing I can do because my eyes have been through this whole story up and down 20 times. That's why I need the fresh, new eyes of others to help me with errors.

Moreover, I am somewhat let down by the lack of reviews with chapter 13. I am asking very little here to get at least 100 reviews with the small amount of chapters I have left. It doesn't make any sense and also makes me a little irritated that the story is at its climax, and no one seems to be out there and the number of readers has dwindled. I saw I got a lot of reviews with chapter 12 cause it was delayed for months, so that's why I pushed this one off for a month or two – just to get you guys addicted and wanting more!

If I am coming off like a jerk, I'm sorry – but I really don't think I'll write another chapter story like this. Time is ticking and I have less and less time to do anything and everything.

To Demile: Yes, I know I should have cleared out the history, but really – you'd never think of that after going on someone else's computer! I'm glad you got a new scanner and hope to see some cool pix from you soon. Yeah, LOL about the title: _Arnold and Helga – two powerful real estate agents battle it out over the most popular properties around Hillwood City!_

To Number6: Thanks for clearing all that up for me.

Can you believe it's been one year since I posted this story? Holy, where does time go? I was gonna post March 27th but the Easter weekend came up and sort of fucked my plans up. Plus fanfiction dot net is always having login problems.

Oh, one last note – I'd like to advertise my upcoming fic featuring the characters from the series _Goof Troop_ and the _Goofy_ movies. It will be up in the Disney section on April 7, 2005 (please god I hope I make this deadline). So if you're a fan, make sure to check it out!

o----o

"Are you sure?"

"I'm sure."

I took a deep breath. "I come from another dimension, where your world is a cartoon show, an animated series on television. I was suddenly transported to your world through my TV, and I have been trying to find a way home ever since."

There was an awkward moment of silence, Arnold just stood there, dumbfounded, "Ok-ay, sorry I asked."

"It's the truth Arnold, why do you think I know so much about your world, the kids, about you?…and why you shouldn't be with Lila." It was now or never to hit him with the big guns.

"What business is it of yours who I like and don't like, huh? Now thanks to you I have no chance with her at all!"

"You should be thankin' me Arnold! You _know_ she is not the one…you _know_ there's someone else."

"Yeah right." he said as he crossed his arms and turned his back to me. It was like I was in the alleyway again with Helga.

"There is Arnold. And I think you know who it is."

"I…I don't know what you're taking about." He was starting to crack.

"Really? _Hmmm_, well…didn't you save the neighborhood a couple months back?"

He looked at the floor, thoughts running through his mind.

"Don't you remember Arnold?…about Scheck…about FTI…the **roof** of FTI…"

Even with his back turned to me, I knew he was starting to squirm, thinking of the events that unfolded on that windy day. I walked my way over to the computer.

"…you wonder how I know it all? You want proof Arnold? I know what happened on that day, I know what went down between you…and her…"

I clicked on a wavsound file on my site…it was Helga's confession.

"_You heard me pal, I love you, _love you_! Who else do you think has been stocking you night and day, building shrines to you in a closet, filling volumes of books with poems about you. I love you Arnold, I've always loved you, ever since I first laid eyes on that stupid football head…_"

The shrilled voice of a girl pouring her heart out bellowed through the speakers that were attached to the computer, making it feel like Helga was right there in his room, confessing it all over again. Just then, that fierce wind outside suddenly burst through Arnold's unlocked skylight window. The current caressed up his body, bringing along leaves and debris twirling around the room, just adding more atmosphere to the revelating flashback.

"_…And from that moment and every moment since I've lived and breathed for you, dreamed of the moment I could finally tell you my secret feelings and to grab you and kiss you and, oh, come here you big lug…_"

The wind promptly died down. Arnold uncrossed his arms and sighed at the floor.

"How could I not intrude on you and Lila? You know as well as I do there is only one person for you Arnold, that likes you as much as you like Lila, and you need to give her a chance, before it's too late."

He sat down on his bed; I sat down beside him with my arm around his shoulder.

"Look, I know it was in the heat of the moment. But Arnold, you just can't go back to the way things used to be. You can't pretend it didn't happen."

He looked up at me – looked like the advisor needed advice.

"I just don't know what do to, Stephen. I mean...what else could we have done but cover it up? The girl that tormented me for almost my whole life just told me she loved me…_LOVED_ me, not like me, not like-like me – _love_! I'm only nine, I-I don't know what love is! I…I…"

Arnold seemed to be at a loss for words. I couldn't blame him. What a messed up relationship they had now. They couldn't just suddenly be boyfriend and girlfriend. Not with the differences between them, and certainly not at the age of nine; the students at PS 118 would have a field day, the stories and taunts would be unbearable.

"…I…don't know if I _love_ her."

"Arnold," I said, "how will you ever find out if you keep denying it happened? You know she would confess it over and over again to make you see how much she cares for you. All you have to do is accept this Arnold and let her know how you feel…how you _really_ feel. You can't let this chance slip away."

Suddenly there was a knock at Arnold's door. We both looked at each other, puzzled at who would drop by so unexpectedly. I got up and answered the door.

"Hi."


	15. All Comes Down To This

**(Original Authors Notes)**

Well, the time from my last update of this story is not something I'd like to retell. The laptop this story, and many other fics were on, went ka-boom. In other words, the hard drive broke down and I lost all files that were not backed up. I did not lose this fic, but in a way I did – as the last saved file I had of it was on floppy disk and it was last modified February 2005…and my hard drive died March 29th. It sucks because I lost A LOT of little revisions and shit. Damn, I am _PISSED!_

Moreover, I can see that times have changed since I first posted this fanfic in March 2004. Interest in _Hey Arnold!_ has started to dwindle down, and the new stories are becoming less and less. It used to be many new fics/updates every day, and now it's like a new and/or updated story every two or three days! It's plain to see that with only three/four reviews on my last chapter, (at the CLIMAX of my story, none the less) compared to the previous 10 reviews a chapter I had going, that people are losing the fascination they once had with the show and it's characters. My dream of 100 reviews on this story I thought would be applicable early on. But now the reviewer's numbers have gone down as well. I probably won't even make 80 under these conditions.

Not even the regulars like Jae and Will, to name a small fraction, aren't coming in anymore to review or to post or update a fic. I can't believe it's been a year since "What Is And What Should Never Be" has been updated! What's going to happen to "Blue Oceans"! I know we are all growing up here and busy with our own lives, and I too have lost some attention with the series. It sucks because I had so many more ideas to write about. But if no HA! fans are left out there, what's the point of writing? I had a current fic I started in 2003, when fandom was still very rapid, and it's still not ready to go since I haven't gotten a reply back from MDT – the original editor of that fic. I bet if I post it now I won't even get half of the reviews I would have gotten if I had I posted mid 2004.

Nonetheless, here is chapter 15. It may lack in wording since it's not the newest version, and I really don't have the time to re-fix everything I modified before my laptop fizzled out. I'd like to put this fic to rest. Who knows, I may re-post the whole damn thing later on and clean it up nicely since I am such an overbearing perfectionist.

I just realized…the _perfect_ song for this part of the story is "The Promise" by When In Rome from 1987. If you haven't heard it, download it. If you can't, ask and I'll e-mail it to ya.

PS – If you like Disney productions like _Goof Troop_ or _A Goofy Movie_, please check out my newest story!

**(New Authors Notes)**

It seems everything happened for a reason. Yes, I lost some story revisions for the last two chapters of this fic, but in turn it made me really look back at the whole story and fix things I may have not caught if the chapters had never been lost in the first place. (Special thanks to Fey Phantom who read the whole story over for me and caught a lot of errors I still would have missed.) Moreover, my laptop dying was the final kick in the ass I needed to buy my own computer, which I finally got running in August 2005. Since then I have been working like a dog tying up loose ends left by the laptop's death, among other projects I can finally tackle with a computer of my own. I'm currently working on a website for the popular Belgian comic/cartoon _Kid Paddle_ that I hope to have online by the end of March 2006.

You can tell most of these authors notes are dated, but there is still some fact left to them. The _Hey_ _Arnold!_ online community has pretty much dried up as of 2005/06, as fans are moving on to other current and popular animated programs and/or growing out of animation all together. That other fanfiction I mentioned above has now been posted as "The Masterplan" which you can get to through my profile page. As for the other writers mentioned here, Will has fallen off the face of the earth in pertaining to HA! fandom and fanfics. As for Jae of "Blue Oceans" fame, thankfully that fic is still being updated! To anyone else who has left a great _Hey Arnold!_ story unfinished – finish it and put weary fans, and your own creation, to rest!

I decided to add the lyrics to the song I mentioned above. It enhances the atmospheric nature of the chapter.

o----o

"Helga!" I said quietly. I was shocked. Here she was at the foot of Arnold's door, ready to lay her cards on the table. I couldn't believe she mustered the guts to come. She slowly made her way past me and into the room. Arnold was still sitting on his bed, and as soon as he saw her walk in he iced up so tightly – it looked as if he was dipped in starch. Helga slowly walked over to him, sheepishly rubbing her arm behind her neck (_You know, like they both do at the end of the movie_). Arnold snapped out of his disbelief and slowly stood up.

So there they were. Staring at each other, eye-to-eye and face-to-face. I was by the computer sitting backwards on the chair. I was biting my lip hard, almost hiding behind the chair's back. My eyes were aching because I didn't want to blink. My hands were almost shaking from what I was looking at. There was a long silence, and you could hear both of their hearts pounding so hard you'd think someone was playing music outside somewhere with the bass turned up. They both wanted to say something, they both wanted to clear the air…but they both seemed to be frozen. Paralysed by their own feelings for one another. Finally after what seemed to be forever, Helga started to speak. You'd think someone was holding a missile to her forehead, the trembling in her voice was so great it made her look like she was going to fall to pieces on the floor.

"A-A…Arnold." You could tell she just wanted to wrap her arms around her love once again.

"H-Helga." Arnold replied. Both of them just couldn't find the words.

"Arnold…we….we have to talk about…it. We just can't keep pushing this aside."

"I know Helga, I know."

"So…how do you feel…about me?"

Arnold practically threw his arms in the air, almost angry at the whole frustrating situation. "I don't know Helga! I mean, you, Helga Pataki, after all these years, after all the torments and spitballs, all the 'football head' this and 'geekbait' that, you suddenly come out and say you love me? _Love_! Talk about something totally out of left field!"

Helga turned her back to him, on the verge on tears. "Arnold, you don't understand! You…can't possibly understand what I went through. All these years, always so close and yet so far. You don't know how long I wanted to say that to you, Arnold. You don't know what you mean to me." She then turned to him, nervously fooling around with her hands. "Arnold, I know I'm not the most popular…or most appealing person in the world. I may be pushy and domineering most of the time; but I try _so hard_ to be a better person Arnold, just so you would notice me…and maybe possibly like me." She paused, searching for vocabulary. "I don't know what I am trying to say here. I want you to have the same feelings for me, I want you to want me…" she turned around again, "but it seems like…that will never be. A fiend like me with a prince like you; I should have given up my ridiculous obsession years ago." she sobbed.

Arnold, swallowing the growing lump in his throat, walked over to Helga and gently put his hand on her shoulder. "I'm sorry Helga, I…I didn't know. But Helga, I noticed you already; you didn't need to try to become another person just to please me. I know you may be a little rough around the edges sometimes…but I know there is more to you then that…"

Helga turned to Arnold.

"Maybe…maybe I always tried to deny the fact that there was something there. All the things we've been through over the years – the biosquare, the school plays, summer vacation…the more time I spent with you, the more I began to like being with you, because I like everything about you. Maybe I was afraid of what you would think if I said I…liked you."

A small smile grew on Helga's face.

"I see the good in you Helga, and I wanted to bring that trait out more often. I wanted to get to know Helga the person, not Helga the persecutor. But it seemed every time I tried to break your wall of defence, every time I thought I saw that Helga I wanted to see – you would react with some cruel gesture or comment, diminishing any hope of me getting to know the _real_ you." he paused, "But with what happened _that_ day at FTI…I was literally blown away…well, my hat was anyway," he joked. "I still toss the word around in my brain, 'love'…"

"That's right Arnold…_love_." she confirmed.

"Helga…I don't know if I love you…but I do know I have feelings for you. I want to know more about you, I want to spend more time with you. I like you Helga, a lot…but…"

"You wanna wait a while, don't you?"

"Helga, I think you would agree with me that nine or ten years of age is pretty young to be getting involved in a relationship where…love is developing. I think we need to wait. Until we've matured, until we're grown more…until were out of the childish taunts and teases of the fourth grade.

Helga was a little taken back from this comment, thinking that Arnold was ashamed of their friendship and wanted to keep it a secret…but she knew he was right. She could hear the whispers in the hall, the scoffs and name-calling. "So we wait. What do we do now?"

"Don't worry about it, let's just take it one day at a time, okay?" he said moving closer to her.

"I'm glad we cleared the air, Arnold. Promise to come back to me?"

"Promise." he said.

They both moved in closer to each other, both sort of confused in what do to. Helga leaned in for a hug, Arnold set out a handshake. Helga then set her hand to shake, and then to my astonishment, Arnold leaned in and kissed Helga – on the lips no less! After they parted, a relieved Arnold and slightly stunned Helga hugged. What a hug, I never had seen two people hanging onto each other so tightly. I couldn't control my emotions any longer; I was slightly sobbing now, small tears running down my cheeks.

"Oh you guys," I sniffed, "…that was so beautiful! That's Oscar winning material right there! Please, someone get me a tissue."

Arnold quickly handed me a box, and I let out a loud (_Insert blowing nose sound effect here as I couldn't come up with anything!_).

Arnold and Helga walked towards the door.

"Thanks Stephen, for everything." Arnold said. "I mean, if it wasn't for you, I might have never uncovered and noticed my true feelings for Helga."

"And all this time I thought you had it in for me Steve, and you were just trying to help." Helga added.

"Well guys, I guess it was my quest. That's why I was sent here. To right a huge wrong in this colourful and quickly two-dimensional world."

Helga whispered to Arnold, "What the heck is he talking about?"

"I'll tell ya later. It's a _long_ story."

o----o

_If you need a friend  
don't look to a stranger  
You know in the end  
I'll always be there_

And when you're in doubt  
and when you're in danger  
Take a look all around  
and I'll be there

I'm sorry, but I'm just thinking of the right words to say (I promise)  
I know they don't sound the way I plan them to be (I promise)  
But if you'll wait around a while, I'll make you fall for me  
I promise, I promise you I will

When your day is through  
and so is your temper  
You know what to do  
I'm gonna always be there

Sometimes if I shout  
it's not what's intended  
These words just come out  
with no gripe to bear

I'm sorry, but I'm just thinking of the right words to say (I promise)  
I know they don't sound the way I plan them to be (I promise)  
But if you'll wait around a while, I'll make you fall for me  
I promise, I promise you...

I'm sorry, but I'm just thinking of the right words to say (I promise)  
I know they don't sound the way I plan them to be (I promise)  
And if I had to walk the world, and make you fall for me  
I promise you, I promise you I will

I gotta tell ya, need to tell ya, gotta tell ya, I've gotta tell yaaaa...

I'm sorry, but I'm just thinking of the right words to say (I promise)  
I know they don't sound the way I plan them to be (I promise)  
But if you'll wait around a while, I'll make you fall for me  
I promise, I promise you...

I'm sorry, but I'm just thinking of the right words to say (I promise)  
I know they don't sound the way I plan them to be (I promise)  
And if I had to walk the world, and make you fall for me,  
I promise you, I promise you I will...

_I will..._

_I will..._

_I will_


	16. Wish Granted

**(Original Authors Notes)**

Here we are – at the end, sort of. I'm not happy with the way things are ending with this fic, mainly because a more revised version of the story lays on my deceased laptop. More than likely, I'll eventually re-post all chapters and tidy up the chapters and author's notes and whatnot. I hate how I am ending it just for the sake of moving on for the time being. I feel the ending is weak, and I'd like to write it longer but really have found no creative time. It may not be this year, or maybe the next, but I'll eventually re-post.

Hell, maybe it would be cool to make a sequel to this story, where I catch up with everyone. But I wouldn't even know where to start, I have no ideas at all for what another version of this story would be like. Is this story worth a second chance? Maybe if the show was airing like it was three years ago, I'd give this story more chapters. I'm losing grip and am out of touch with the characters since I haven't seen the show since October 2004. Man o man, if only there were _Hey Arnold!_ DVD's.

To Kastirina123: You say some of the last chapters were disappointing. How so? I'd like to know what was bad so I can improve the story. I'm glad you think I kept the characters true to themselves, because I thought they were a tad weak.

To DarthRoden: You say you have an idea like this? I really hope you continue to pursue that idea, because I'd like to see your take on this concept.

Number6: I never even thought of the idea to talk to Arnold about his parents. Oh well.

I will still write more _Hey Arnold!_ fics if I find time. The one I have been working on for over two years still isn't 100 percent ready for upload, but it will be in time. And I can only hope that some of my favorite authors, and you know who you are, will update their stories that haven't been touched in months and for some of you, a year or two.

**(New Authors Notes)**

Here we are – again it seems, at the end of the story. I'm now content with its completeness and it's now as perfect as it's going to be. It didn't take me long to come back to this story – I posted the last chapter May 2005 and came back just seven months later to officially finalize this fic, re-posting chapters every so often. Now as I re-post this last chapter, it's been two years since I first posted this story on March 27, 2004. My-my how time does fly. I still wish I could have expanded more on this chapter – to quote Jae it needed a little more "depth to its content". Perhaps the _whole_ story could have had more depth as well. Could I write a sequel to this story? Like stated above, I wouldn't know where to begin, but it's a fun concept to toss around in my head from time to time. I'm always open for people to tell me their ideas. Again, thanks to all my readers and supporters, and keep an eye out for my new fanfics as they are posted. Peace.

o----o

Well, I had done the almost impossible. I brought Arnold and Helga together. It was like a dog playing piano – not totally impossible, but highly, highly unlikely.

It was about midnight. Arnold had gone to bed after thanking me countless times for what I did, making him realize his heartfelt feelings for the girl in pink. I was on the computer again, surfing the net, checking the Z-Files message boards. I let out a big yawn, and started to drift away into a slumber.

My vision started to blur in and out of focus. The computer monitor shone a white, misty glow of light across Arnold's dark room. I felt my eyelids getting heavy, and I softly fell asleep.

o----o

I groggily woke up after a while. I quickly looked around, noticing I wasn't at Arnold's desk anymore. I was on the floor with a laptop beside me. I was…back? I was _back_! I was in the living room again, the ending credits to the last episode on the tape were rolling. I must have fallen asleep while trying to find an idea, it was close to 4am…

Had I just dreamt it? The whole thing: being transported, the good times, the reconciliations of Arnold and Helga. Did four days in my dream just whiz by in four hours in my life? I felt so empty, it _was_ all a dream, none of it was real…

Just then I felt something in my pocket. I took out the object…

The microcassette recorder? There it was in the palm of my hand, in 3-D real life form. I hit play…it was Helga's adoration from the janitors closest…but that wasn't all. It must have been voice activated, because it also recorded the whole conversation with Arnold and Helga in his room. The recorder was in my pocket during their heartfelt conversation – I forgot I had left it in there.

"But who…how could this…have happened?" I didn't understand. It was like there was a missing piece of the puzzle of intergalactic proportions. Was it a dream that just felt _so_ real? Mixed up by my inner subconscious? Was Arnold's world just an embodiment of my internal thoughts and imagination? Did my soul…the spirit of me somehow cross the outer limits of my world and into theirs? Was that the "fourth wall" Robert was referring too? But animation is just fiction, right? How _could_ it exist in another world? Then I started to think if I tried to piece anything of what happened together, I would lose my mind.

"Maybe some things are better left unexplained." I quietly said to myself, still staring at the recorder in bewilderment, wondering how this device ended up here.

But at least now I had a story to write about, and what a hell of a story it was. It had adventure, comedy, suspense, romance – all in one exciting and convenient package. It was truly a great escapade to write about…

And that's what I did.

**The End**


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